


Ah shit, here we go again

by obamamouthed



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ableism, Ableist Language, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, Angst, Autistic Dave Strider, Canon Gay Relationship, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dirk Strider and Dave's Bro Aren't the Same Person, Drugs, Family Reunions, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Humanstuck, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marijuana, Misgendering, Music, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Selectively mute, Sign Language, Size Difference, Trans Dave Strider, Trans Male Character, Transphobia, bigkat, i think the stuff in this counts as angst, rword
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:27:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27728756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obamamouthed/pseuds/obamamouthed
Summary: Dave, as of four years prior, finally escaped Bro and is now living his best life as a roommate to his friend Jade. He's in his senior year of high school and starts to notice that his long time best friend, Karkat, may not want to just be friends with him anymore.I suck at summaries.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 5
Kudos: 30





	1. Is this bro time or gay time?

**Author's Note:**

> oh uh by the way i may project onto dave a bit during this story, so sorry if at times his actions seem out of character or someshit.

“I can’t believe you _actually_ said that to Rose,” Dave’s friend said, huffing out a laugh. Dave looked back at his friend, a hand wrapped around the strap of his backpack, and cracked a small grin.

“Dude, of course I said that to her. She was all up in my grill and actually roasting me pretty hard, so I had to throw _something_ back at her” Dave chuckled, holding the door open for his friend. It’s his senior year in high school and he’s been living with his friend Jade since freshman year. At the end of eighth grade he had finally cracked and told his friends about his home life with Bro, and to his surprise and pleasure they had all jumped up and scrambled to get Dave the hell out of there. Dave was going to live with John, but his Dad only makes so much money and really couldn’t afford to feed another mouth. Rose wanted Dave to live with her, practically begged her mom to let him stay, but she finally came to her senses and realized her mom should really be sober for longer than 6 months to take care of another kid. So, with all other options exhausted, Jade's grandpa took him in. It’s not like Jade or her gramps didn’t _want_ Dave to stay with them for an undetermined amount of time, but Grandpa Harley is kind of old fashioned and didn’t want a boy who Jade wasn’t even related to staying over. It took awhile for Jade to reassure him that her and Dave were just friends and nothing more, and he gave in because Dave's situation was too much to ignore. Grandpa didn’t warm up to Dave immediately, in fact he kept quite a close eye on him whenever he was alone with Jade -- but Dave understood, Jade is a nice girl and she needed someone to protect her from gross dudes… even though she's actually kinda buff and could easily squash him if he did something she was uncomfortable with, but that hasn’t happened since Dave loves the younger Harley like a sister and as no interest in some sort of Sweet Home Alabama type fantasy. Anyways, Grandpa Harley likes him much more now and even tries to slip him cash for protecting Jade from bullies at school -- like he’s Jade’s personal bodyguard or something, which is laughable since Dave was, and still kind of is, a twig. He’s gained some more weight on him since moving in with the Harleys, but he's still small from years of lacking nourishment.

“Hello? Earth to Dave? Dude, you really need some Adderall for that ADHD. You’ve zoned out on me for at least five minutes!” his friend shakes his arm a bit more firmly, causing his binder to shift and pull uncomfortably.

Oh yeah, he forgot to mention who exactly this friend is. This is one of his best friends, Karkat. He’s a bit taller than Dave, has a dark, even tan, a head of curly black hair, and is a bit more buff than Jade is. Dave kinda jerks his arm away from Karkats relentless shaking, and somewhat playfully bats away at his hand. “Bruh,” Dave answers him, and continues with a lowered voice “you kinda shifted around my binder, it's hells of uncomfortable right now.”

“Shit, sorry,” Karkat backs away a bit, possibly giving Dave space so he doesn’t get overstimulated, “do you want me to guard the bathroom while you fix it…?” he asks, giving Dave a concerned look that makes him a little embarrassed.

“Uh, yeah that’d be a good idea” his voice cracks a bit, god damn testosterone making him go through a second puberty at fucking 18 years old. He calms himself down and falls back into a cool state, leading Karkat to the school's only single stalled/gender neutral bathroom. Dave goes inside the small bathroom, locking the door behind him while Karkat is standing guard outside of the door. Dave sets down his backpack and removes his shirt, facing away from the mirror. The binder he's wearing is kind of newer than his others, so he has to take it off and put it back on to get comfortable again. Before taking off the binder he feels something wet glide down his face and puts a hand to his forehead to wipe it off. Sweat, dammit. He looks into the mirror and sees that he's sweating a bit, it was going to be a bitch getting this thing off while sweating. Dave takes some paper towels, dabs at his wet, gross face, and sighs.

“Hey, everything okay in there?” Karkat's voice makes him jump, and tense, but eventually relaxes. It’s just Karkat, not anyone else.

“Yeah, I’m chill, I’ll be out soon,” Dave reassured him, kind of lying. If he doesn’t cool off soon he’s going to be forced to ask Karkat for help, and that's pretty much the exact opposite of what he wants to happen. Dave starts tugging up the fabric, trying to go slow enough to not get stuck. He attempts to pull his arm out of the strap of the binder but he’s still too sticky from sweat to get it off without hurting or chaffing himself. Taking a deep breath in and out he tries to pull his other arm out of the strap and…. No dice, duh. Dave huffs out in frustration, resisting the urge for a facepalm x2 combo, and walks over to the bathroom door. He slowly clicks the lock and cracks the door open, looking up at Karkat.

“Hey, are you ready to-- oh,” Karkat cuts himself off, realizing that Dave is still red in the face and shifting his shoulders uncomfortably, “do you need me to go get rose or jade?”

Dave looks away, feeling exposed even though he has his shades on, “Rose left in a hurry to go hangout with Kanaya, and Jades probably in her Grandpas car already…” he swallows a lump in his throat, “I kind of need your help,” he whispers, “unless you’re uncomfortable with that, then I can try to get it off myself, it’ll take awhile and you don’t have to guard the door the whole time” he tries to keep his voice even but his dysphoria is nagging at him and --

“No, it’s okay, I’m not uncomfortable with it. I’ll only help if you let me, man” Karkats words soothe him, realizing he's in a judgement free zone. He’s been shirtless in front of Karkat before, he has with most of his friends but never shirtless and lacking a binder, it’s kind of overwhelming… but it’s okay to do it with Karkat, dave supposes, they’re such close friends and either Karkat or another close buddy would end up seeing him without a binder sooner or later. This train of thought actually calms him down a bit, so he keeps it in the front of his mind. _This is a no judgement zone, Dave, chill out_ he thinks to himself as he shuts the door after Karkat is in the bathroom with him.

\---

“So, uh…” Karkat croaks out, trying to be as quiet as he can, and shifts on his feet, “how do you wanna do this? Like, do you wanna face me or have your back to me?” Karkat asks, sheepishly rubbing at his neck. Augh, why does he have to be so awkward about this? _Get it together, dude, you’re just helping out your friend!_ Karkat yells at himself in his head, averting his eyes from the smaller boy in front of him. He can’t lie to himself, he has kind of had some feelings for Dave for a while now but hasn’t made a move since Dave didn’t seem interested. He glances at Dave, scanning his red shoulders before looking him in the face as the smaller boy speaks up.

“Uhm, I guess I’ll just face away? Shit, I’ve actually never had someone help me out with my binder before…” Dave explains, his voice getting quieter towards the end of his sentence. Wow, he's the first one to see Dave without his binder on? Karkat cringes at himself inside his head for thinking that, shoving away the thought.

“That’s okay,” Karkat comforts his friend, “if you need me to back away or stop or something just let me know and I’ll do it.” Karkat reaches out slowly so that Dave can see what he’s doing and gives a light, comforting pat on his shoulder. Dave gives a shy, weak smile and mumbles out a thanks while turning around. Karkat looks at Daves back, quickly taking note of every mark and scar that lined and crossed his back - a wave of sadness and pity washes over Karkat, he’d seen some scars on daves arms and collarbone, a few on his face and some on his legs, but his back looks so much more cut up. It’s as if he was whipped, scars crossing over each other, some scars wider, darker, and bumpier than others. It takes a good amount of will to pull himself together and ask Dave what he should do.

“Oh, I guess I’ll just lift my arms up and like… you can just pull it up and off of me?” Dave breathes out the last part with a shaky sign, clearly trying to calm his nerves. Karkat mumbles out an alright and then hesitates, “should I just, like, uh, damn… pull it up from the sides? I don’t wanna stress you out further by getting too close to your chest, but I also don’t wanna end up hurting you if I only pull it up from the back… y’know?” Karkat says this carefully, he doesn’t want to seem like a creep or be moving too fast for him, he’s done his research on how to help keep people from having anxiety attacks related to their dysphoria… those articles were mostly about, uh, how to do that during sexual situations but this is probably more intimate than that - maybe even especially for dave? Karkat doesn’t ask that, only waits for Dave's reply.

\---

Oh man, Karkat is actually being really comforting with this whole situation. Not that Karkat’s not a good guy, but Dave can’t help but expect someone to just be extremely awkward about this and not care for his comfort. Dave agrees with Karkat, mumbling out that going from the sides is a good idea, and he can feel his face heating up. Is he seriously blushing right now? Damn, he gets some basic decency during a… kind of intimate situation, now that he thinks about it. Okay, maybe getting hot in the face isn’t _totally_ not normal, but damn if it isn’t the tiniest bit embarrassing. Dave shyly lifts up his arms, nodding his head when karkat asks if he's ready. He shivers and tenses up a bit as Karkat curls his fingers under the sides of his binder, relaxing as Karkat stays still and asks if he’s okay.

“Yeah man, I just, uh,” he stutters out, wishing he could hide his body from his friend as he looks down and realizes his whole chest and shoulders are hot and turning red, “shit, hah, this is just kind of… intimate? Shit, sorry if that’s weird to say. I don’t mean it in a weird way or anything, and not that this situation is weird either. God damn, this shit is kind of uncool, I look like a fuckn’ tomato right now, jesus. Man, what’s a better word for intimate? I don’t think there is one, shit this is fucking gay- i mean, shit, not gay” Dave rambles on, begging himself to shut the fuck up, feeling Karkat’s eyes on him. Maybe he should tell him that it’s okay and he can, eventually, get it off without Karkats help?

\---

Karkat looks down at Dave as he rambles on, observing all the shades of red and pink Dave’s skin is turning into. _It’s kind of cute_ Karkat thinks to himself fondly, not throwing the thought away. He knows how to get Dave to shut up when he’s nervously rambling, but this is a kind of different nervousness emitting from Dave and Karkat doesn’t really know what to do… So, he slowly pulls him into a hug, keeping it loose enough for Dave to break free if he’s uncomfortable.

“Is this okay?” Karkat asks, trying to keep his voice steady, as his heart is trying to jump out of his throat. It takes a bit for Dave to notice that Karkat is embracing him, and freezes as if he’s trying to wrap his head around the now even more intimate situation that Karkat put him in. Dave slowly relaxes, shaking out a small “yeah” as he lowers his arms to hold onto Karkats.

\---

Dave realizes that they’ve kinda been hugging for a while now… at least for a few minutes longer than what would constitute as a normal, comforting hug between two bros. Dave wants to keep hugging because, to be frank, he’s actually pretty touch starved but Jade and her Grandfather are most likely waiting for him out in the parking lot.

“Hey, uhm, Karkat?” Dave starts, voice just above a breath, and continues “Jade is probably waiting for me… I think we should hurry up and get this thing off of me.” He feels Karkat nod and they get back to getting this stiff binder off of him.

Dave and Karkat walk to the school exit and down the stairs of the doorway that lead them out into the parking lot. He exchanges words with Karkat, thanking him for the help and giving him a Tender Bro Embrace ™. Dave sees Grandpa Harleys truck pull up next to where he and Karkat were standing, which is odd because usually Jade's Grandpa likes to conserve gas and would have Dave walk to the truck but he blows off the thought and waves a goodbye to his friend. Dave open the car door and hops in with his bag between his legs, shutting the passenger door he greets the driver “Sup, Mr. Harley-” Dave cuts himself off, he smells something familiar but… that smell isn’t supposed to be in this vehicle. He looks up at the driver and his heart sinks.

  
“Hey, _David._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the writing on this is a bit rough but it does get better as the chapters go on.


	2. I Don't Wanna Do This, Bro. I Don't Wanna Make This Happen.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shiiiit get ready for some suddenly heavy shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when you see this * start playing the song Endless, Nameless by Nirvana if you want the full experience of that scene.  
> also another cw/tw for slurs and name calling, both ableist and transphobic, be safe yall.

“Hey, _David._ ” the driver sneered at Dave, making his name sound like poison. It was Bro, he could tell by the smell of his cologne, looking at him after so many years makes his stomach churn.

“How did you get Mr. Harleys truck?” Dave croaked back, trying to keep his tone unbothered as he searched for a way out but found that the lock pin was ripped out of the hole in the passenger door. His heart pounding in his chest, praying Bro couldn’t feel his blood running cold.

“This is my truck. Did you really think you could escape me forever? I’ve kept tabs on you, I got my truck tailored to match this “Harley” dudes truck and you were dumb enough to fall for it, *****.” Bro replied all too simply, spitting out Dave’s deadname. Dave had escaped him for four years, how did this happen? It takes Dave no time to become angry at Bro for calling him by his birth name and reacted without thinking.

“Don’t fucking call me that!” Dave yells and launches a closed fist at Bro, only to be met with an open fist catching it and twisting his arm into a painful position. Bro slaps him across the face, telling him something about acting like a “young lady” and to “buckle the fuck up”. Dave does what he’s told and buckles up, grabbing at his seat for stability as Bro peals out of the parking lot. Dave doesn’t talk the whole ride back to his brother's apartment, trying to make up some sort of plan to escape Bro once they get there. He’s probably thinking way too hard because he passes out from forgetting to breathe, without Jade or other friends with him there’s no one to remind him to breathe when he’s having a meltdown.

****

Dave is slowly brought back to reality as someone shakes him and slaps his face, he can hear Bro yelling at him. All of this is far too familiar and he visibly shudders, earning him a harder slap.

“I know you’re awake, retard. Get the fuck up and get to the roof.” Bro hisses at him, yanking him to his feet by his arms. Dave, wide awake now, tries to wrestle out of his brother’s grip.

“No, fuck that! Let go of me, fuck!” Dave yells, trying not to cry. Bro tightens his grip on Daves arm and begins to drag him upstairs to the roof. Dave continued yelling at his aggressor, punching and kicking wherever he could as he was being led to his personal battle ground. The door to the roof swings open and slams against the outer wall, Dave is thrown against the gravel and he hears the door being closed. He looks up to the door and doesn’t see Bro, panic settling into his whole body. He scrambles to the door only to be grabbed by the back of his shirt and thrown further away from his escape.

“Get up.”

“No!”

“I said,” Bro flashsteps behind Dave, grabbing him by his arm and raising him off the ground to look at him face-to-face, “get,” he kicks Dave is the side, sending him to the ground a few feet away, “up.” Dave violently shakes his head, refusing to participate in this sick game Bro had put him through for 13 years. He knows that his continuous refusal will only make Bro angrier, but he’s not going to strife him even if it’s the last thing he does. Dave looks over to where he expected Bro to be but, unsurprisingly, he wasn’t to be found just… Lil Cal slumped over on his side in the crushed stone, copying how Dave was laying only a few feet away. Great to know Bro’s mocking mind games were up to par, real great. Okay, he needs to stop staring back at Cal and fucking do something because it's eerily calm and the air is stale from lack of movement.

“Fuck,” he grumbles as he clutches his side, broken rib again. Dave stumbles, struggling to get up, hands on his knees, and looks back at Cal. Little fucker is sitting up straight now. A sharp pain from his broken rib shoots across his chest and back, causing him to suck in a sharp breath of air.

“You’re still weak” and a slash to his back is what he gets in reply for his groans of pain. With a yelp Dave falls to the ground, landing on his hands and knees with a grunt. Dave might as well throw the game back in Bros face, so he gets up slowly and stands in a kickboxing stance.

“Yeah?” Dave digs his right heel into the gravel, closed fists guarding his face, “well, you’re still an asshole.” He feels a small gust of wind behind him and whips around to throw a punch, obviously missing, and is knocked to a knee with a swift kick from his brother. Still on one knee, Dave swivels around to try to trip Bro. He remembers the one time he almost got Bro with this move, just barely hitting his shoe, and Bro went much harder on him after that. “God, I mean, the fuck you want me to say? “You’re right?” Nah, fuck that noise, I got some motherfucking truth to hit you with, bro.” he continues, getting back up to his fighting position. “You’re literally a psychopath, bro. Fuckn beating my ass for 13 fucking years, shoving your goddamn plush rump puppet porn down my throat. Who the hell does that? Not a normal person, that’s for fucking sure,” Dave walks slowly in a tight circle, taking in his surroundings. The hot Texas sun beating down on his open wound and throbbing head, it felt so much hotter than it should for November. “And then stalking me for however long, copying my friends Grandpa's truck to basically kidnap me for another strife? Jesus, I don’t know how I _ever_ thought you were actually coo-” he’s cut off by a sudden hand around his throat and soon the lack of ground beneath his feet. Squirming under the iron grip, he looks back at the sadist who has him stuck writhing in pain. His eyes are met with a furious face and his blood feels thick as his heart pounds at the sight. He clutches his small hands around Bro’s wrist, realizing that he’s being dangled over the edge of the building.

“Fuck, what the fuck are you doing?” he hollers at the older man, attempting to kick him. Bro pulls him back so he’s in his face, the heat of his rage radiating off of him.

“Teaching you a lesson for running away, tranny,” he retaliates, breathing into Dave's face. He can’t help but grimace and look away, trying not to smell the alcohol and cheap tobacco on his breath, his eyes shoot down to look at the city below.

“Drop me,” he blurts out. It catches Bro off guard because his face contorts from anger into confusion, Dave takes his only chance at escape. He digs his nails into Bro’s wrist, causing enough pain to force him to loosen his grip on Daves neck, kicks both of his legs up and uses them to propel off of him. Bro is either surprised or doesn’t care because Dave is still falling. He plummets, feeling a sense of relief and fear numb his body. He feels his back hit something hard and flat, stopping him from plummeting further, and his vision goes black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this is such a short chapter, working on the third as i type this. not much davekat action in this one, but its a slow burn yall. id really appreciate some feedback as i write so i can make this a better story to read, so dont be afraid to leave any feedback in the comments. peace.


	3. Hospital visits and techno music

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wooo here's another one, it was originally going to be a part of chapter two but i decided against that cuz it didnt seem to flow properly. anyways, yes there will be some more davekat in this chapter cuz yknow thats what this got damn story is about. also, music chapter again, so when you see * please start playing Fragments Of Time by Daft Punk if you want the full experience of that scene, this chapter is longer than the others, so please enjoy!

Dave’s consciousness comes and goes. There’s a lady? She sounds kind of panicked, yelling for someone to do something. And now he hears sirens? Ohh, shit, he’s not dead. Damn, that’s certainly a surprise. The lady is yelling again, something about staying awake? _Haha nahh, fuck that_ Dave thinks to himself, he’s way too tired to stay awake right now. Dave guesses he blacked out again cause some dude is talking to him, asking if he has any family that they can notify. _Oh, damn,_ he realizes that he should force himself to stay awake so that he can ask them to dial up Jade’s Grandpa.

“Sir, sir, please stay awake. Can you give us a last name? Sir,” a voice echoes in his ears, didn’t he hear dave say “Jade Harley”? Dave tries to repeat the last name, but nothing comes out.

  
  


  
  


Dave stirs in his sleep, feeling cold. He lets out an audible groan and mumbles about it, and soon a warm cloth is laid on top of him. He tries to move more but he feels stuck and can’t move his leg, no pain but he feels a dull ache as he struggles against the pressure encompassing his leg.

“I think he’s waking up! Oh my gosh, Dave?” a familiar voice reaches out for him as he opens his eyes to a bright room and squeezes them shut again.

“Ah, shit, too bright,” his voice raspy and cracking as he tries to hold his arm up to block the lights. A pair of shades are slipped onto his face and he opens his eyes again to see a white room full of people. Dave realizes that all of his friends are standing around his bed expectantly, a worried look on all of their faces, “What happened?” he asks, his throat feeling dry against his words.

“Oh my gosh, Dave! We were so worried,” Jade babbles at him, clearly resisting the urge to pull him into a hug, “You never came to Grandpa's truck and it was starting to get dark out so we were about to go looking for you and messaging our friends to see if they had seen you but Karkat called us! He sounded so worried and frantic, we could barely make out what he was saying! He said he couldn’t explain and to just meet us at the hospital because you were really hurt!” Jade is trying not to cry as she stumbles over her words, and you look over at Karkat as she talks.

“Damn, sorry about that Karkat…” Dave apologizes, feeling a bit guilty, “I must’ve told them to call you since you were the last person I saw.” He sees Rose pique interest at this, damn her and her need to psychoanalyze everything. There isn’t even anything to analyze about this shitty situation. Dave hears Karkat mumble out an “it’s okay”, averting his eye and playing with a loose string on his sweater.

“Dave,” Jade starts, a shade of worry covering her face as she knits her brows into a concerned shape, “... what happened?”

“W-well, I-” Dave stumbles over his words, a lump is caught in his throat as his mind reverts back to the smell of Bros cologne and the panic that settled in him once the hum hit his nose. He squeezes his eyes shut, feeling the heat of his brother's hatred in his face, the firm grip on his neck. In the distance he hears a faint, rapid beeping, something that isn’t part of that memory. A sound of hurried footsteps coming closer makes him panic more as he feels several hands and arms struggling against him, trying to restrain him. He can feel tears streaming down his face and the sensation of something popping on his back before being stuck with something sharp in his arm. He fights against it, his limbs becoming heavy and his mind slowing down, soon his fussing comes to a stop.

\--- 

Karkat watches on, hugging Jade close as she forms tight wrinkles in his sweater with her fists. He can feel the guilt and fear radiating off of her as she hides her face away from the scene unfolding in front of them. Soon they, along with Rose and John, are ushered out of the room by a few more nurses. Karkat and Jade sit down on a small couch, her muffled sobs soaking into his shirt. Karkat rubs soothing, slow circles into her back and tells her it’s okay and that Dave will be fine. But even Karkat doesn’t believe his own words. Yes he’s seen Dave have meltdowns from overstimulation and panic attacks from being reminded of his brother, but nothing this violent. Usually Dave just crumbles in on himself and forgets to breathe and needs something to bite down on to avoid hurting himself, it’s a pretty quiet fiasco. This, however, was a full 180. Quiet at first, the heart monitor was beeping faster and faster, but then he started to thrash around and claw at his neck. God, it was awful and Jade probably thinks it’s all her fault.

Jade pulls away from Karkat, wiping a few runaway tears from her eyes and giving a weak sniffle. Rose taps her on the back, handing her a few tissues which Jade glady takes and uses some to clean up Karkats shirt before tending to her own face.

“Thank you, Karkat,” Jade smiles weakly, her gaze downcast.

“Of course, Jade,” Karkat says, patting her on the back lightly, and looks at Rose, “do you possibly know what happened?” Rose, surprisingly, doesn’t say anything and simply shakes her head. Karkat nods and looks around the waiting room, thankfully empty, and looks back at Jade, “Where is your granddad?”

“He’s talking to the nurses, he got kinda heated that they stuck Dave with a tranquilizer instead of doing… oh, I don’t know, there wasn’t really anything we could do! I don’t think any of us have seen Dave in a meltdown that serious before…” Jade buries her face into her hands for a moment before continuing, “he probably just got made because he’d react the same way if someone did that to me while I was having a meltdown, he might actually be talking to them about his autism too…”

Everything is quiet for a while, John silently excuses himself to go to the bathroom and Rose speaks up after a few minutes.

“Karkat, would you happen to know why Dave would ask them to call you and not Jade’s Grandfather?” she asks, quirking an eyebrow.

“Well, I dunno…” Karkat thinks for a moment, “maybe because we were hanging out after school? I saw him get into Mr. Harley's truck, it pulled up right beside us in the parking lot.”

Jade quickly interjects, “That wasn’t us, Karkat, we never pull up… We always wait for Dave in the parking lot, Grandpa likes to save up on as much gas as possible.” her eyes are getting wider the more she explains, tears forming in her eyes.

“Oh, god…” Rose utters in realization, her hand covering her mouth. Karkat looks back and forth between the two girls.

“What? What’s going on?” he asks, needing answers. Who the hell could’ve been driving Harley's truck, or more reasonably a look-a-like? “If that wasn’t you and your gramps, who the fuck else could it have b-” Karkat cuts himself off, his mouth left ajar in realization, “Oh, fuck…” Everyone goes silent, there’s a tense fog hanging over their space.

“Uhm,” John lets out awkwardly, being back in the waiting room, “what’s going on…?”

“Bro,” all three friends say at once, earning a small “oh shit” from John.

  
  
  


After a few hours a nurse and Grandpa Harley come back into the waiting room to let the four teens know that they can come back to see Dave, who has woken up again but is still groggy from the medicine they gave him. They come back into Dave’s room, his shades are still on and his absently playing with a small fidget toy -- something that Grandpa Harley probably gave him to help keep him calm. Dave smiles weakly at his friends and gives a small wave, he motions Jade to come over and gives her the best hug he can.

\---

Dave hugs Jade gently, trying not to hurt himself further. He popped several stitches in his back during his meltdown/flashback/panic attack thing? It was a lot. Now that he’s fully awake, still a little doped up but awake, he realizes that his leg is in a cast. Luckily not his whole leg, it’s low enough that he can still bend his leg but high enough that the rough cast scrapes against the underside of his leg when he bends it. His arm is in a sling, and the doctor told him he got a severe concussion and several broken ribs. He freaked out a bit about the idea of not being able to wear a binder, but Grandpa reassured him that Jade will be able to find some sort of alternative and gave him a small fidget toy.

“Uhm, so Jade,” Dave speaks up, his throat feels a bit better but his voice comes out higher than he wants, clearing his throat he starts again, “the doc says I got some broken ribs, so I wont be able to wear a binder for awhile… Grandpa said you’d be able to find some kinda alternative?”

“Oh, yes!” Jade pulls out her phone, quickly typing, “there’s this thing called “Transtape”, it’s like tape but made specifically for binding a bit more safely.” She gives her phone to Dave, urging him to scroll through a website. He does and, wow, there’s a lot of options here. Different colors and widths for the tape, along with some other things if you get the kit.

“Could… we possibly get this?” he asks hesitantly. He doesn’t like asking for things, especially when they cost money. He knows Jade will buy something like this for him, but it still feels bad. Jade, of course, nods her head eagerly and puts her phone away. She goes up to her Grandpa and asks for a red band which she slips onto her thumb, she’ll remember to buy it when she’s scrolling on her phone.

“Thanks for being here, all of you, but I’m going to be here for awhile and I don’t want you guys to feel like y’all gotta stay here all night…” Dave mumbles. He feels exposed without a binder on but doesn’t want his friends to go, so he gives them a choice. John says he’ll have to go in about an hour because his Dad is going to be worried if he doesn’t come home until tomorrow. Rose, and of course Jade, say they’ll be here as long as he lets them. Karkat is oddly quiet, but agrees with Rose and Jade.

  
  
  
  
  


Hours go by again, John leaves like he said he would but his three other friends stay. Later into the night Karkat pulls a chair up to Dave's bed and shares a pair of earbuds, listening to some Daft Punk. Rose finds herself leaning on Jade's shoulder, in return Jade settles down and places her head on top of Roses, both looking on at Karkat and Dave from across the room. Rose pulls out her phone to try to sneakily take a picture of the two boys, but Jade swats it away and pokes at Rose. She complies, putting her phone back into her pocket, figuring Jade is right and that maybe this part of Daves life shouldn’t be documented.

  
  


*---*

  
  


Karkat is sitting next to Dave, sharing a pair of earbuds. He doesn’t particularly enjoy Daft Punk, but Dave put on a more tame album for them to listen to. It’s called Random Access Memories, and it’s actually kind of nice… Karkat can recognize some of the songs on the album as they are more mainstream. Soon the song, Karkat peaks at his phone for the name, “Fragments Of Time” comes on. As the lyrics go on Karkat takes a fondness to the song, coming to an agreement with himself that this song kind of explains how he feels whenever he’s with Dave. He looks over at Dave, who is looking right back at him, and quickly looks away.

“What’s up?” Dave asks, probably noticing how not bro like Karkat was being. _Shit_ Karkat thinks, mentally slapping himself.

“N-nothing,” he says, waving his hand flippantly, “just, uhm… glad you're okay…” well, that wasn’t a _total_ lie. Dave, too tired to give a quip to Karkats weird behavior, just chuckles softly and seems to go back to listening to their music. _Oh, god,_ Karkat facepalms inside his mind, _it’s not “their” music, it’s Dave's music._ Karkat tries to calm himself but Dave starts to shift towards Karkat more, saying something about how the cord is pulling too much between them. Karkat, shaking a bit, scoots his chair to be flush against the side of Daves bed and rests his head against the upright mattress of the mechanical bed. It's kind of uncomfortable for the rest of his body, but the mattress lets his neck and head relax. They shit there for a few more minutes, the song they were listening to has come and gone. Their heads are just inches apart, the mattress acting as a small barrier between them. Karkat closes his eyes, lightly tapping his foot to the next song. He feels Dave shifting around on the mattress, he’s about to tell Dave to stop fucking moving before he pops his stitches again when Dave starts talking.

“Hey…” he says, just above a whisper, “c… can i, uhm…” Karkat looks up at Dave before looking down at his hand, he’s making a kind of grabby motion with his fingers. Karkat has seen Dave do this before but only with Jade or Rose, usually when they’re out in public and it’s bustling with activity.

“O-oh, uh, yeah, sure,” Karkat replies with a low voice, snaking his arm under Daves and hesitates before intertwining their fingers together, “i-is this okay…?” he asks, not daring to look up at Dave. He hears Dave hum softly in agreement, Karkat sighs quietly in relief. His stomach is flipping the fuck out, butterflies multiplying. He looks up at Jade and Rose who are smiling sweetly at him, he averts his gaze as his face heats up.

This was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im really enjoying writing this stuff, who knew writing in a creative fashion could be so therapeutic? anyways, hope yall enjoy this too. now i gotta start writing a school essay soon, ugh :/


	4. We Only Watch It For The Cute Kid, Not The Hot Dude In Armour....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The days had come and gone, Dave was finally discharged from the hospital. Karkat rolled Dave down in his wheelchair into the parking lot, Dave would’ve done it himself and most likely tried to pop a wheelie but one of his arms was still in a sling. Grandpa Harley’s truck doesn’t have room to put the wheelchair in so Karkat volunteered to drive Dave back home and to school once he’s well enough to go back.
> 
> Karkat and Dave spend more time together now that Karkat helps him to and from class, carrying his backpack while Dave walks with crutches beside him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw there will be very vague spoilers for the newest episode of The Mandalorian, so id suggest watching the episode before reading this chapter. again it's very vague, but still, if you don't want spoilers then go watch the episode.
> 
> not a music chapter this time, unless you want to listen to the music that is mentioned

Karkat walks with Dave to lunch, Jade packs his lunch for him and Karkat buys so he sets their stuff on the floor and tells Dave that he’ll be right back. It’s practically routine now, it’s comfortable. When he comes back to Dave he reaches out to hold Karkats plate so Karkat can gather their things again, they’ve done this like clockwork for a few weeks now. They walk into the library for some quiet while they eat, listening to music just like they did back in the hospital that night. Karkat finishes eating and pulls out the book he has to read for a class, before he can get the book open to where he left off Dave speaks up.

“Hey, before you bury your nose in that book, can I tell you something?” Karkat looks at Dave, but can’t tell what kind of information he’s about to receive because those damn shades block out any emotion in Dave's face.

“Yeah, of course, what’s up?”

“I just wanted to thank you, for um, being there for me that night in the hospital.” Dave falters at some of his words, looking away bashfully.

“Yeah, man, of course. But everyone else was there too y’know, do we need to get your head checked out again?” he jokes, bumping shoulders with Dave.

“Haha, no I know everyone else was there too, I just…” he looks back at Karkat, a small blush filling his cheeks, “I just wanted to thank you, sp-specifically…” he rubs the back of his neck, turning away his gaze.

Karkats heart flutters, he can feel his face heating up, “o-oh, yeah, uhm, no problem,” _ugh why do I have to be so awkward!?_ He realizes that he’s still looking at Dave and tears his eyes away from his face to look back down at his book. He doesn’t know if he can read it anymore now. He takes out his phone and shoots Kanaya a message.

**CG: HELP.**

She’ll know what it means.

And apparently she did, because she messages him right back.

**GA: Meet Me After Class?**

**CG: YES.**

Karkat puts his phone away, and then his book because now there’s no way he’s able to read it anymore. The bell rings, signalling that lunch is over, and Kakat lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding in. He gathers their things and walks Dave to his next class and then walks to his own class. Time goes by faster than he expected it to, like the universe was telling him to hurry up and get it the fuck over with so he can talk to Kanaya. Karkat sends Dave a message before leaving his classroom.

**CG: HEY, CAN YOU WAIT IN FRONT OF YOUR CLASSROOM FOR A BIT? I NEED TO TALK TO KANAYA.**

**TG: aight**

Karkat walks over to Kanaya's classroom and they go into a quieter hallway.

“So,” she begins, “Dave problems again?”

“I guess you could say that but it’s more of a “Karkat” problem than a “Dave” one..” he replies, trying to keep his voice down.

“Well, don’t keep me in suspense. Give me the details,” she’s been spending way too much time with Rose.

“He thanked me for being there for him at the hospital”

“Karkat, he probably did that with everyone else too-”

“Kanaya,” he cuts her off, “he said he wanted to thank me _specifically_.” and she makes an “oh” face which turns into a smile.

“No, no, Kanaya, no,” he puts his hands up and shakes them, “no, we both know he has some trouble with social cues a-and he probably didn’t even mean it like that.” She gives him a look that says “ _really?_ ” but doesn’t voice her doubt.

“Well, I guess we’ll never know,” she gives him a coy look, “unless you do something about it, of course.”

“You’ve been hanging out with Rose too much” she laughs at his deflection.

“Go on and drive that boy back home, you’ve been leaving him _high and dry_ for far too long now” he scoffs at her innuendo and gives her the finger as he walks away, she knows he doesn't mean it and giggles at his frustration.

  
  


\---

  
  


Dave waits for Karkat outside his classroom, he knows Karkat won’t leave him at school but with this break in their routine he can’t help but to be anxious. To avoid thinking too deeply about it he puts on some music, specifically some Gorillaz and even more specifically their newest album: Song Machine. The only reason he got into Gorillaz is because his main man Snoop Dogg had made an appearance in one of their songs, after that he maybe fell in love with the band and tries to keep up with all of the lore.

He puts on his headphones, moving one over to the side so that he can hear if Karkat comes down the hallway, and leans up against the wall. He nods his head to the music, it’s one of their calmer songs but still has a pretty sick tempo. Instead of flapping his hands or doing one of his other stims he opts to mask his pleasure, just keeps on nodding his head. The songs go by and one with more rapping comes on, he changes the song because he won’t be able to stop his stims with those sweet bars dropping in his ears.

Karkat comes jogging up to him, kind of red in the face.

“Hey, coolkid,” he huffs out with a smile.

“Yo,” he replies with a smirk, that used to be Jades nickname for him but he likes that Karkat has started calling him it too, “Kanaya got you hot under the collar again?” He slips his headphones down to his neck, music still playing.

“S-sure, something like that,” he says, obviously trying to play it cool in front of Dave. He rolls his eyes in return, even though Karkat can’t see it from behind the shades.

“Let’s go, my leg is killin’ me,” he says, handing his bag to Karkat, “also I wanna show you some new music, I can’t keep my mask on while listening to it” he finishes with a sheepish look on his face. He knows Karkat doesn’t mind his stims or the fact that he’s autistic, but Dave can’t help but feel embarrassed when talking about it. Karkat nods, taking the bag and giving Dave a pat on the shoulder.

“Sounds like a plan,” he smiles at Dave, his stomach tries to flutter but he pushes that shit down. He knows Karkat is bisexual or something, but he doubts that Karkat would be interested in someone like him so there’s no point in catchin’ feelings.

They walk to the car, Karkat is being oddly quiet, maybe Kanaya _and_ Rose were there and really got under his skin? It sounds like a thing that could’ve happened. They get in, Daves crutches in the backseat, and Dave immediately plugs his phone into the aux, turning to the one song he refused to stim to. He keeps his movements below the window so that passing drivers won’t stare, slapping against his legs and bouncing his shoulders just a bit.

\---

The song passes and a softer one comes on. Halfway through the song Karkat reaches to turn the music down and begins to talk.

“So, about earlier,” he glances over at Dave, who is tapping his hands against his thighs, “I just wanted to say that, like, I’m glad you’re doing okay. It’s been hard on all of us, none of us like to see you hurting, but I’m…” his hands tighten and then relax against the steering wheel, “I’m _specifically_ glad that you’re okay…” 

He glances over at Dave again, his face is slowly starting to turn red. His freckles look so much darker against the glow of his blush, _shit, he’s so cute…_ Karkat focuses back on the road, turning down the road that leads to Jade's house. It’s a Cul de sac so Karkat will have a quick getaway in case shit gets more awkward. Dave is still quiet, fuck.

Karkat pulls in front of Jade's house, reaching into the backseat to get Daves crutches as he stands outside of the car with his bag on.

“Hey, Karkat?” he asks, taking the crutches from Karkat and situating himself.

“Yeah?” he replies too eagerly, holding back a cringe so that Dave doesn’t get the wrong idea.

\---

“Do you wanna hangout this weekend? Like, at my house? We can just chill in my room. Or, I mean we don't _have_ to. We can just chill out in the living room or something, whatever you wanna do. I-I mean, if you wanna come over…” _oh my god please shut up, someone get me to shut my fucking mouth._ Dave stands there thinking to himself, shifting uncomfortably between his feet.

“Oh, y-yeah, sure man, I’d lo-like to come over,” he stumbles over his words, averting his eyes away from Dave and sees that he forgot to unplug his phone from the car, “oh, here, don't forget this,” he hands the phone over to Dave.

“Text me? To just, y’know, let me know what time would be best to hangout.”

“Yeah, of course.”

They stand there for a moment, completely silent, until Grandpa Harley comes out of the house.

“Dave, there you are! Hurry inside kiddo, dinner is about to be ready.” he motions for Dave to come inside. _Oh thank fuck, this was so god damn awkward._ Dave thinks as he shuts the car door and waves a small goodbye to Karkat, watching him pull out of the cul de sac, and hurries inside.

  
  
  


The rest of the week goes by torturously slow, and it was only Wednesday when he asked Karkat to come over. Karkat is coming over around two, but didn’t specify how long he was staying over. Jade will be out with some girl named Nepeta until six, so she won’t be able to snoop on them while they chill. Not that they’re gonna be doing anything snoop worthy, shut up. Get your mind out of the gutter, jeez!

Anyways, it’s 1:30 and Dave is frantically cleaning his room. Karkat has seen his room at its worst before, and it wasn’t even close to being that messy, but Dave still wanted it to be tidy at the least. _Shit, should I have prepared some snacks or some shit?_ He thinks for a moment, but that thought is kind of stupid. They’re _just_ hanging out, no need to pull out the fuckn’ party bowls or anything. 1:45, fifteen minutes until Karkat should be here. Okay, room clean: check. Time to go chill the fuck out and watch some TV in the living room. Before he can sit down on the couch his phone buzzes in his pocket.

**TT: Hey, are you ready for your big date?**

**TG: god damn it rose how do you know exactly what im doing all the time**

**TG: wait let me start over**

**TG: its not a date**

**TG: just two bros hanging out**

**TT: Fine, whatever you say.**

Dave left it at that, he doesn’t need to egg her on by messaging her back and he certainly doesn’t need her all up in his head. So much for relaxing, now she got him all flustered.

Dave sits on the couch, letting out a sigh of relief. He should be using his crutches around the house but he’s always tripping over all of Grandpas collections so there’s really no point in trying to maneuver around it when there’s practically something new there everyday.

There's a knock at the door, Dave shouts a “be right there” and grabs one of his crutches. Karkat is kind of a mother hen and will without a doubt get upset seeing him without at least one of his crutches. He opens the door to let Karkat in and they do a silly secret handshake they made up a few months ago. It’s so _ridiculous_ but Dave does it anyways because it makes Karkat happy, and who _wouldn’t_ want to see that smile he makes after they finish their handshake?

Karkat shuts the door behind him and huffs out something about Dave only using one crutch, but leaves it at that.

“So, wanna go up to my room and watch something? Another episode of The Mandalorian came out and I know how much you love seeing that little Baby Yoda.” he teases, but they both know that Dave also likes the new series. Mostly because of all the sick explosions and battles and the small quests he has to go on, but who can resist a literal knight in shining armour?

“Yeah, but we both know your gay ass can’t help but to look at that masked man. What is up with that, anyways? You only see his face one fucking time in the whole series so far.”

“Everyone knows what the actor looks like under the helmet, dude”

“Okay, but _still._ ” Karkat goes on, starting another classic rant. Dave, of course, doesn’t pay attention to what he says. He likes the sound of Karkat's voice, it’s like listening to your favorite song while you do some assignment you don’t like. It just makes life easier hearing him talk, y’know?

Dave tries to push away that train of thought as he turns on his TV and logs into his Disneyplus account, going over to the lightswitch and dims it as the screen loads. He hops back onto the bed but not before grabbing a fidget toy, watching movies or shows gets him kind of anxious so he needs to keep his hands busy.

“Alright, let’s do this shit,” he says and clicks on the newest episode.

Dave is lying next to Karkat, with Karkat laying on the side of the bed next to the wall so Dave can easily get up to get snacks or get a different fidget toy. They both chuckle at Mando’s lack of understanding about the Jedi, yet neither he nor Karkat really know who this lady with the orange skin is. They know her name, but they don’t really know her motives as a character because to be frank they aren’t exactly huge Star Wars fans like Jade is. After giving each other a strange look at finally knowing baby yoda's real name and laugh at each other for being on the same wavelength, they’re about halfway through the episode already and Dave starts to think about what else they could do to pass the time since it was barely 3pm yet.

\---

After laughing at each other Karkat and Dave settle down and continue watching the show. Karkat realizes how close he is to Dave and feels his face getting warm. _Come on, just do it_ he thinks to himself, trying to work up a nerve. _It’s now or never, and this is the perfect moment._

Karkat scoots closer to Dave and after hesitating for a moment puts his arm around Dave's shoulder. He feels Dave tense up at this.

“Is… this okay?” he says almost breathlessly, hoping Dave can’t feel his heart pounding. After a seemingly very long moment Dave relaxes and nods his head ever so slightly, humming out a consenting tone. Karkat sighs silently in relief, he can feel Dave vibrating next to him… from excitement? Being anxious? Karkat doesn’t know, but he doesn’t ask because he doesn’t want Dave to feel bad for whatever emotions he’s feeling.

\---

_Ohshitohshitohshitohshit-_ Dave can feel his hands getting clammy and wipes them off on his jeans, he can feel himself shaking. _Is this platonic? It doesn’t feel platonic, should I say something? Shit, can he feel me shaking? Damn it, strider, chill the fuck out._ Dave grabs a fistful of his blanket with the hand that, hopefully, Karkat can’t see. Karkat isn’t doing anything _wrong_ per se, but it sure is a helluva lot to take it in. _Do homies do this?_ He can’t remember doing something like this with John or vice versa, he’s done it with Rose and Jade but he sees them as sisters so _of course_ it’s platonic when he does it. He shoots a quick glance at Karkat, being careful not to fully turn his head, and a wave of relief washes over him as he sees that Karkat is still glued to the screen.

Dave figures that this is… _okay,_ and slowly tilts his head over to rest on Karkats shoulder. Karkat seized up a bit, but relaxed after a few moments. The air in the room is a bit tense, but not the same tenseness that he experienced when living with Bro. It’s… nice. He guesses he can watch the rest of the episode after Karkat leaves and closes his eyes to take in the calm moment and the dull beat of Karkats heart in his ear. He’s just going to rest his eyes, it would be totally uncool to fall asleep on his best bro. 

Dave hears the clacking of nails against the hardwood floor outside his room and a small creak of his door, so he peers over at the door. It’s just Bec, no biggie. He expects Bec to saunter off after a moment but he doesn’t, he just… watches him and Karkat. Dave unfurls his fist from the blanket and makes a shooing motion at Bec, _it’s fine Bec, jeez, go be a dog somewhere else,_ he tells the white dog in his mind. Strangely, Bec seems to get the message and backs out of the room to finish patrolling the rest of the house. Dave is always unnerved when Bec seems to read his mind, especially since the dog only seems to actually listen to Jade or her Grandpa. Bec has accepted Dave to be a part of the family but probably thinks Dave still needs to earn some sort of respect in the dogs Pack to be able to verbally tell him commands.

He puts Bec out of his mind, feeling the dog's aura slowly grow weaker as he wanders farther into the house, and closes his eyes again.

\---

Karkats stomach is still fluttering around from Dave putting his head against his shoulder, his face is probably bright red right now against his tan skin. The episode is almost over, Mando is talking to the lady with the orange skin and striped… hair? He thinks it’s hair. Yeah, it’s gotta be hair. She’s strangely beautiful, for an alien. Or at least the actress playing her makes her look beautiful, he doesn’t think he’s seen her before until now.

Karkat glances down at Dave, and he looks… so peaceful. It’s endearing and yet somehow sad. He doesn’t think he’s seen Dave look so tranquil ever since the day he went missing and ended up at the hospital. He still won’t tell anyone what happened, so the group can only theorize about what happened. Jade is certain that Bro must’ve been stalking Dave and her family since Karkat swears he saw Dave get into Grandpa Harley’s truck, so Bro must’ve gotten his own truck customized to look like her Grandpa's truck. Thinking about it makes Karkat shudder, thanking God that Karkat gets to be with Dave the majority of the week so that Bro can’t get to him again. Mr. Harley voiced about trying to press charges against Bro but once Dave found out he put his foot down, apparently his brother has connections with local police departments and reassured him that nothing would come of it if Grandpa tried to press charges.

It makes Karkat a bit sick so he puts a pin in his thoughts for later, he just wants to enjoy this moment with Dave.

The end theme music comes on but Dave doesn’t move to turn off the show, he stays still. Karkat can feel his hot breath condensing on his sleeve, he gingerly sets his head down on Daves. He doesn’t tense up again, so he’s either asleep or just really content. Karkat doesn’t know which would be worse, Dave being asleep and having no idea that they’re almost cuddling right now or being perfectly aware of the situation and still being next to him.

Dave starts to shift around and Karkat feels relieved until he realizes that Dave now has an arm draped over Karkats stomach and his head is now on Karkats chest. He doesn’t want this to end but holy shit what is actually happening????

Karkat shakily puts his free arm on top of Daves, gently holding his forearm and running his thumb across his skin. Dave’s shades are poking him in his chest and it's quite uncomfortable so he slowly, slowly brings his hand off of Daves arm and reaches for his shades. He hesitates before gently grabbing his shades by the bridge with three fingers. Dave tenses under him from this so he stays still until he can feel him relax and slides his shades off of his face. Dave lets out a small sigh once his shades are fully off of his face. Karkat hands the hands over to the arm draped over Dave's shoulder and sets them down on the bedside dresser with a soft clink. Karkats puts his free arm back onto Daves and softly rubs his thumb over a scar which earns a small shiver from Dave, who then nuzzles his face into Karkats sweater. His heart leaps into his throat as a hot blush rushes into his face.

\---

Dave nuzzles his face into Karkats chest. He _knows_ this isn’t platonic behavior, but he can’t remember the last time he cuddled with someone. Maybe he never has? He’s never really even dated anyone before, he tried to once but it just wasn’t right. The girl was nice, a bit weird, and Dave was glad she couldn’t see what his eyes looked like. God, that sounds so bad but damn if it isn’t the truth. She was also kind of obviously more interested in someone else, someone who didn’t have problems with their body. Someone more confident, it’s what she deserves anyways.

So, being all snuggled up like two peas in a pod with his best bro? Yeah it’s far from normal, homie behavior but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying this. _Man, if Bro saw me like this he’d-_ Dave shoves the thought away, not wanting to get worked up and have Karkat push him away… Would Karkat push him away? He doesn’t know and doesn’t plan on finding out anytime soon, he just wants this feeling of safety to last forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was super long, sorry about how the texting format is i have no fucking idea how to change the colors. hope yall enjoyed this regardless. peace.


	5. What?

They’ve must’ve laid there for longer than they thought because soon the front door opens and Jade is yelling that she's back home. Karkat feels the urge to push Dave off of him, but he’s snoring ever so softly and he looks at peace right now. Karkat is surprised that Dave doesn’t wake up as Jades heavy footsteps ascend to Dave’s room. The door opens slowly, creaking as Jade peers into the room. She looks surprised for a moment but then smiles fondly at Karkat, he looks away as a blush spreads across his face. Karkat hears the door close and Jade walking more quietly to her room, he sighs and looks down at Dave.

_ He has so many freckles…  _ Karkat studies his face, his eyes slowly gazing down his neck and-  _ okay, no, don’t start ogling your friends bod _ he thinks as he looks back up at Daves face. His hair is slightly wavy, just barely ghosting past his eyebrows. He doesn’t have golden hair like Rose, it’s a bit more of a dirty blonde - especially near the roots. He can’t help but realize how beautiful Dave really is, he’s never seen this much of his face. Every small scar and freckle, his long lashes that rest against his cheeks. Dave hasn’t even shown him his eyes. Karkat has tried to ask Rose and Jade what they look like, but they refused to tell him and said it would be Dave’s choice if he wanted Karkat to know what his eyes look like. It made Karkat really frustrated, but John ended up telling him that Dave was relentlessly bullied for it as a kid and had very few friends until middle school. It’s why Dave always wore those shades, to, apparently, avoid being seen as a “freak”. Karkat thinks that Dave probably just has two different eye colors or something, kids can be cruel for such small differences like that.

Dave shifts again from under him, asking for his shades. Karkat reluctantly hands over the shades, trying to hide his disappointment as Dave looks back at him.

“Uhm, how much longer do you want to stay over?” Karkat is kind of surprised by the question, he expected Dave to ask that they don’t talk about that cuddle sesh they just had.

“As long as Mr. Harley will let me,” Karkat smiles softly at Dave, seeing the pink dusting his cheeks. It’s still dim in the room, only the tiddie light on the ceiling and the TV screen giving some light to the room.

“Cool,” is all Dave says as he gets up and grabs his crutch, “you hungry?”

“Starving,” Karkat replies with a small laugh.

  
  


It’s about 7:30 now, Grandpa Harley made some dinner and now he and Dave were back up in Dave’s bedroom. They’ve just been watching some youtube and shitting around, doing what they usually do. Dave asks if Karkat wants to just listen to some music and chill, so Karkats asks if they could listen to one of his playlists this time and he agrees. Karkat takes out his earbuds again and hands one to Dave as they lay back down on his bed, he presses shuffle.

A soft rock song comes on, it’s one Karkat knows by heart, Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden. Karkat hums to the lyrics, a smile creeps onto his face as he sees Dave tapping his hands to the beat. Soon an 80’s song comes on and Dave looks over to give him a cheesy smile, it’s a song by Simple Minds (you know the one).

“The majority of this playlist is stuff I find nostalgic.”

“Dude, we are both 18 and this is a song from the 80’s. How is this nostalgic?”

“My mom used to play a lot of songs from the 70’s and 80’s when we visited her” Karkat replies, smiling fondly at the memory.

“Oh, that’s nice” Dave says, there’s much less sadness in his voice this time. Whenever he mentions his mom Dave seems to get a bit upset, but Karkat doesn’t know if it’s because his mom is dead or because Dave grew up without one to protect him from his brother. But this time Dave seems less sad than the last time Karkat mentioned his deceased mother, it gives him a weird feeling inside.

A few more songs pass, one from Tyler, The Creator comes on. Dave seems happy that it comes on, it’s an artist that he’s used to. Karkat looks down at his phone.

“... “Smuckers” huh?” he says, giving Dave a look.

“I don’t know why it’s called that either,” he chuckles.

\---

_ Ohhh fuck yes, Tyler is the muthafuckn MAN dude, _ Dave feels a smile grow on his face,  _ did Karkat add this song because I like Tyler? Nahh, he jus’ knows good shit when he hears it. _ Dave decides.

Dave enjoys doing shit kind of stuff with Karkat. John would be saying something dumb like “I’m not a homosexual, Dave!” like  _ okay _ John, jesus.

“So,” Karkat speaks up, Dave looks over at him, “how’s the tape working out for you?” Okay, kinda personal but they DID just have a whole fuckin’ cuddle sesh about two hours ago.

“It’s okay, not as comfortable though…” he mumbles, looking away and suddenly feeling more self conscious.

“Sorry if asking that made you uncomfortable,” Karkat murmurs while shifting on the bed so he’s laying on his side and facing Dave, propping his head up with his hand.

“No, it’s cool” Dave places his hands flat against his stomach and interlaces his fingers, looking back at Karkat.  _ Shit, can this not get awkward again?  _ He pleads in his head.

Thank god Dave has his shades on because he can’t help but notice how Karkats bicep flexes as he uses his hand to prop his head up. He forces himself to look away, hoping that he’s not red in the face again.

Something must’ve caught Karkats attention because he’s looking at the other side of the room now, Dave turns his head and sees Bec standing in the doorway again.

“Sup?” Bec, of course, doesn’t reply and just stares at them.

“Does he do this often…?” Karkat mumbles to him, Dave gives a nod.

“Yeah, he did it earlier while we were…” Dave trails off, staring back at Bec, “um, while we were watching The Mandalorian.”  _ yeah, that save was about as smooth as skating down a dirt road… Bec puh-LEEZE go away. _

“Bec, you’re cute n’ all but we’re tryna chill here man,” he states, even though Bec won’t listen-

And there he goes, right out the fuckn’ door.

“ _Holy_ **_shit_** **.** ”

“What?”

“Dude, Bec  _ never _ listens to me. I can’t wait to tell Jade about this, fuck yeah.” Dave laughs and pumps his fist into the air. Karkat snorts out a laugh, covering his face after.

Dave turns his body to Karkat, lying on his cast, scrunches up his nose with his finger and makes a snorting noise. Karkat gives him a playful shove and says shut up, Dave pokes him in the side in retaliation.

“Oh, you wanna be like that?” Karkat huffs out another laugh and grabs Dave's side, gently digging his fingers in. Dave bends in at the touch, squirming around and laughing loudly as Karkat continues to tickle him with vigor. Soon Dave can barely breathe, trying to ask Karkat to stop.

“Aaaahaha-  _ dude fuh- _ ck, ahaha shit dude, im d-dying c-” huff “can’t br _ eaaatheee- _ ” his sides are aching now, he weakly pushes Karkats arms until Karkat finally lets up. Karkat has a pleased look on his face that says “gotcha bitch” and it makes blood run into Dave's face. The shared earbud fell out of Dave’s ear in the process of being relentlessly tickled, the faint music playing from the earbud is loud enough that Dave can hear what song is playing.

  
  


*---*

  
  


Karkat scans Dave’s face, a shade of red bleeds over his face. Music fills his ears as he gazes at Dave, all he can think about is how beautiful he looks right now. Red in the face, slightly disheveled, hair a mess… Dave would hate to hear being called beautiful, but Karkat can think it all he wants without Dave getting upset. He knows he’s staring but he can feel Dave staring right back at him.

Karkat picks up the other earbud and gently presses it back into Dave’s ear, feeling the heat of his blush emitting off of him.

Suddenly Dave gets up and excuses himself to the bathroom, startling Karkat.

“O-okay,” he says, mentally slapping himself again for sounding so needy.

  
  


\---

  
  


Dave feels bad for getting up so abruptly like that, but he needed to get the fuck out of that situation. It was nice, still is nice, but the emotion was so overwhelming and he didn’t want Karkat to see him stim like this.

He turns the sink on to mask any possible noise he might make and starts to stim. He shakes one hand, he’s not much of a flapper, and soon starts to shake his other hand too, enjoying the sound of his wrist clicking and his finger softly slapping together.

After doing that for a while Dave starts to calm down and turns off the sink, not wanting to waste more water. He cracks the knuckles in his hands before leaving the bathroom and heading back to his room.

He sits down on his bed, uttering a soft “hi” before laying back down on his back with his fingers interlaced over his stomach again.

“You okay?”

“Y-yeah, just uhm, needed to stim… in private” Dave says with a hushed voice.

“Can I ask if it was a good or a bad stim?” he looks over at Karkat, who has a worried look on his face, turning his gaze back to the ceiling before speaking.

“It… it was a good stim,” he lets out a small sigh before finishing, “don’t worry.”

Karkat nods in acknowledgement and lays back down on his back. The room is silent, with the exception of music playing softly from both earbuds which are set in between Dave and Karkat. Dave doesn’t like to be so…  _ vulnerable _ like this.

  
  
  
  


The weekend had come and left all too quickly, Karkat was back at helping Dave to and from classes. He’s made a bit of a promise, a goal, to himself ever since that night he got to hold Dave so close and how it felt… so  _ right _ .

Karkat wasn’t going to let Dave out of his sight, aside from when he was with others in class or at home or, y’know, using the bathroom because Karkat isn’t possessive. He’s just very, very protective over the people he loves - especially people so vulnerable like Dave.

He knows Dave isn’t  _ helpless, _ he can sure as hell fight but the kid has a strange relationship with his own self preservation. And someone who doesn’t know how to properly play the defensive isn’t going to be able to prevent themself from getting hurt, emotionally and physically.

Karkat would try to sign him up for self defense classes, but Jade  _ just _ got him to go to therapy less than a year ago and that whole situation was like pulling teeth. It’s like Dave thinks he’s weak for needing healthy coping mechanisms, and Karkat doesn’t want Dave to think that no one thinks he can defend himself in circumstances that warrant physical action.

Karkat pulls himself from his thoughts as Dave exits his classroom, he needed to talk to his teacher about something - possibly a project.

“Alright, let’s get something to eat. I’m fucking starving,” Karkat greets Dave, earning a quick glare from a passing teacher for swearing. Dave gives a small nod and follows next to Karkat.

The walk to the lunch room is… oddly silent between Karkat and Dave. The conversation is clearly one sided since Dave is barely saying more than five words at a time. Karkat decides he’ll just put a pin in the conversation until they get to the library to eat. Dave doesn’t really talk that much throughout lunch either.

_ Maybe he’s just having a bad day? Should I ask if he’s okay? Man, this is so much fucking harder than it used to be…  _

Karkat doesn’t say anything but instead reaches into his bag, pulling out a pencil and a notebook. He opens it up to a blank page and slides the two items over to Dave, who kind of just shakes his hands out in front of him with his palms facing up.

Karkat holds out his right hand, palm facing dave, and runs his index finger down his palm in a vertical fashion - it’s the sign for the word “what”. Neither of them know a ton of ASL but it does come in handy when Dave gets like this, or when he’s too self conscious to speak.

Dave replies by simply signing “that”, his left hand in the shape of a Y and slapping down onto his right palm. He then makes the weird shaky hands gesture again, then signs “means”, and then copies Karkats signing of “what.”

It takes him a moment to understand what Dave is saying, that shaky-palms-upward-hands also means “what”. Karkat gives a thumbs up and then brokenly signs “want to draw?”, which Dave nods his head to and picks up the pencil.

First, of course, he starts drawing dicks because he’s  _ that _ guy and makes Karkat laugh. After a few minutes of dicking around Dave starts to actually draw, doodling pictures of his friends. His art is actually quite nice, but he knows that Dave will never see it that way. Practically everyone in the school has read his webcomic, SBaHJ, but no one except Dave’s friends know that he made it. Hell, he doesn’t even know if anyone besides himself has seen Dave  _ actually, really _ draw. He hopes others know that Dave is a good artist, but it makes him feel special to believe that he’s the only person who has seen Dave’s talent.

Karkat is startled from his thoughts by the ring of the bell and begins to pack up his things. Dave gives him back his notebook and pencil, which he also tucks away into his bag.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> blarghhh school is hard, sorry if my updates become less frequent.


	6. The Boy Who Draws

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wooooo two chapters in one day fuck yeah

Karkat drives Dave to school.

Karkat walks with Dave to his classes.

Karkat eats lunch with Dave.

Karkat drives Dave home.

Everyday has kind of been the same for the past few weeks. Drive, walk, eat, walk, drive. Dave still isn’t talking as much as he used to and it’s getting pretty concerning. According to a reliable source he’s been verbally speaking with everyone else, everyone but Karkat.

He’s asked Jade about it, she just said that he has a lot on his mind right now. It’s kind of getting on his nerves, did he do something wrong?

Karkat is driving Dave home again, like he has every day of the school week.

\---

“Okay,” Dave perks his head up to look at Karkat, “What’s going on? You’ve, apparently, been verbally speaking to everyone else except me. So, whats up?”

“Nothin’ man”

“No, bullshit. Jade told me you’ve had something on your mind,” Karkat sighs, “you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“Yeah…” he says quietly, wringing his hands.

“So… like, whats up?”

“Can we go to your house today?”

“My hou- damn it, Dave, stop deflecting,” Karkat groans, glancing at him.

“No, deadass, can we?” Dave replies quickly, peering over at Karkat.

Karkat gives him a look, though Dave can’t place what it means, and then rolls his eyes with a small smile.

“Alright, sure. Luckily enough Kankri went back to his college dorm so we won’t have to deal with him boring us to death,” Karkat changes direction.

  
  
  


Dave follows Karkat into his room, looking up at his new Mandalorian poster and smiles. He looks back at Karkat when he speaks.

“Uhm, sooo…. Do you just wanna watch some stuff for a bit?”

“Sure, and you know I’m fine with whatever you put on - even those lame romcoms” he lies. Dave doesn’t think they’re lame per se, just not what he’d watch on the daily like Karkat.

“Just for that I’m putting one on,” he replies, blowing a raspberry in Dave's direction.

They hop on the bed as the movie starts, now Dave waits.

_Man, should I be paying attention? Fuck, who are these characters? Why is that girl getting mad at the dude? He laughed at something, shit, I should probably at least chuckle or someshit. Oh my fuck, did that really just happen? We are literally like 30 minutes into the movie and he’s already put an arm around my shoulders again. Okokokok, chill the hell out dude, freaking out is the polar opposite of cool._

Dave is practically vibrating in his seat right now and he’s pretty sure Karkat has noticed because he’s looking at him now.

“You doin’ okay over there?” Karkat asks, giving Dave's shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“Y-yeah, totally chill” he says hastily.

Karkat nods and starts to remove his arm from Dave’s shoulders but he grabs it then quickly lets go of it.

“That’s okay, y-you can uh keep it there… if you want…” he mumbles, red in the face as Karkat puts his arm back on his shoulders.

He thinks to himself for a moment before taking a breath and speaking up again.

“Hey… I actually have something to tell you, or uh, show you really” he chokes out, moving to sit upright and crosses his legs, “can you sit over there?” he finishes, pointing for Karkat to sit across from him.

“Uh, okay…”

“Can you maybe like, close your eyes or something? No wait, fuck, thats weird…” he mumbles, digging his nails into his skin.

“Here,” Karkat says, holding out his hand, “don’t hurt yourself, just squeeze my hand.” Dave is trembling, his hand gives it away as he holds Karkats hand. There’s some sort of relief that comes with holding hands with others, but holding Karkat’s hand only makes his trembling intensify.

“Okay so, this is gonna be kinda crazy so like… prepare yourself or whatever,” he closes his eyes, his arm shaking as he reaches for his shades.

\---

Karkats hand already aches from Daves vice grip on it, he squeezes back to distract himself from the pain.

“Dave, I’m sure whatever you show me is going to be-” he stops, seeing that Dave has taken his shades off with closed eyes. Karkat can feel his heart stop for a moment.

He wants to tell Dave that it’s okay and that he only has to do this if he really wants to, but nothing comes out.

Dave finally opens his eyes, slow and unsure, as Karkat looks in awe.

“Terrifying?”

“Beautiful…”

Dave looks away, loosening his grip on Karkats hand. Karkat looks away too, he didn’t lie when he said that but he also didn’t mean to say _that._ His eyes were a gradient of red, dark red near his pupil that turned brighter throughout the rest of his iris - so, what else could he have said?

“You… you don’t mean that… do you?”

“I-I do, yeah… they’re nice,” he whispers and looks back at Dave who won’t meet his gaze, “can you look at me… um, please?”

Dave hesitates but looks back at him, gnawing on his bottom lip. Karkat stares into his eyes for what feels like forever before handing him his shades.

“Yeah, I think they’re beautiful… here,” Karkat opens Dave's palm and places his shades in them, “I’m glad you shared that with me.”

Dave puts his shades back on and visibly relaxes.

“Do you want to listen to some music now?” he asks, moving back to sit next to Dave.

“Yes, please, fuck,” Dave breathes out and laughs, smacking his head back down on the pillow.

  
  
  


Karkat drops Dave back at home after a few hours, giving him a hug instead of a fist bump before Dave gets out of the car.

Karkat gets back home and flops down on his bed, feeling warm and proud. He looks over at his backpack and decides to look at what Dave drew in his notebook, he didn’t get to see everything that he drew at lunch since Dave hates being watched. He gets up, takes out the notebook and flips through the pages as he sits on his bed.

Dicks, dicks, dicks, john, dicks, rose, jade, another dick, some cartoon characters that Karkat doesn’t recognize. This… goes on for several pages, wow. The drawings get more and more detailed as he looks through, a portrait of Jade gets his attention. Woah… it looks so amazing. There’s details in this picture that Karkat hadn’t even noticed before, small wrinkles above her eyebrows and smile lines on her cheeks.

He turns the page.

“Oh…” Karkat puts a hand up to his mouth, a small blush dusting his face. He takes his hand away from his mouth and lightly traces over the picture with his fingers, “t-that’s me…”

The picture is just as detailed as the other one, depicting the stubble on his chin and each curl in his hair. _He makes me look so nice…_ Karkat feels a tear well up in his eye and quickly wipes it away, not wanting to ruin the picture.

He carefully rips the picture out of the book and pins it up on the corkboard hanging beside his bed. He lays back down on his bed, pulls out his phone and calls Kanaya.

“Hey, Kanaya? Yeah I know it’s late. Yes, this is important.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the short chapter, i wanted to make all of them at least 2,000 words but im tired asf and this seemed like a good place to leave off for now


	7. Stoner Kids, Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw/tw for talk of and partaking in drug use, cancer is mentioned once too so cw/tw for that as well.

About a week has passed since the day Dave showed Karkat his eyes and he can’t get them out of his head. How is someone just born with eyes that color? Maybe it was a side effect of him being light sensitive? Karkat will ask Rose about it later, she always knows about weird shit like this.

Karkat pulls up to Dave's house, he only has a brace on now but is still using the crutches because the scooter was “so totally uncool” and didn’t want to be seen using it.

Dave pops open the back door and tosses his crutches inside before getting into the passenger seat and closes the door.

“Can I?” Dave asks, pointing at the aux cord.

“Sure”

“Sick,” Dave reaches over and plugs in his phone, clicking on his playlist of Tyler The Creator.

Karkat starts the car and puts it in drive, it's a cool December morning and the heat is on low. As the car heats up again Karkat starts to smell something… weird, kind of smelly.

“Dude, did you just rip ass in my car right now?”

“No, the fuck, why?”

“The fuck is that smell then, strider, it smells like a skunk,” Karkat glances over at him, narrowing his eyes in suspicion as Dave looks away and seems to look like a child who just got caught fucking with their moms make-up.

“ It’s weed.”

“What? Dude, stop mumbling,” Karkat turns into the student parking lot of their school.

“It’s pot, yo, dang,” he says, grinning like an idiot.

“It’s fucking what now? Dave, you’re fucking with me. Just tell me you got sprayed by some poor skunk.”

“Dude,” Dave turns to face Karkat, lowering his shades to reveal his red eyes. No like, not just his red eyes but his slightly bloodshot, droopy eyes, “I’m literally high right now.”

“Oh. My. God. Oh my god, Dave. Why are you coming high to school?” Karkat asks, flabbergasted.

“Because I’ve been doing it for the past year, like, ok chill. I smoke only one bowl once a week, ok? I’m not “addicted” or someshit, aight?” 

“Ok, fine, fine. How did you even get this shit? Isn’t this illegal?” Karkat asks, cocking his head to the side.

“Maaan, Jade has a card, so it's only like, half illegal.”

“I don’t think it works like that…”

“Dude it’s only a crime if you get caught” he snickers, running a hand through his hair.

Karkat lets out a sigh, they sit there without talking while Tyler plays over the speakers. After a long moment Karkat looks back at Dave.

“Does… it feel good? Being high, or whatever,” he asks hesitantly.

“Yeah, man. As long as you’re with someone the first time, otherwise shit can feel kinda… strange, maybe even scary. That’s just what I’ve heard though, I’m always with Jade whenever we have a sesh so I don’t feel paranoid or anything.” Dave states, looking back at Karkat, “oh, you can also get super hungry. But it’s mostly just being silly and thinking of dumb shit that everyone thinks is fucking genuis at the time.”

“Oh, okay…” Karkat turns off the car, not wanting to use up any more gas.

“Yup, and if you ever have any questions about it just ask me or Jade… ooorrr” Dave stretches against the seat, arching his back, “you can always come over sometime and smoke with me. No pressure though.”

“Really?” Karkat tilts his head, hands on his lap.

“Yeah dude,  _ real _ stoners don’t fuckn’ go around and try to force weed down other peoples throats.”

“No, I mean - well I didn’t know that, but that’s not what I was asking,” Karkat opens his door but doesn’t step out until he hands Dave his crutches, “Jade would be okay with that?”

“Oh, hell yeah dude. She’s super chill with it as long as you don’t tell a bunch of people, she’s not tryna be the schools plug. Jus’ keep it in our friend group, yeah?” Dave grabs his crutches from Karkat and hops out of the car.

“Just lemme know if and when you wanna do it and I’ll let Jade know, she may not wanna join us depending on the day but she’ll probably pack a bowl or someshit for us if that’s the case.” Dave closes the door and walks over to Karkat, “you comin’ or what? I got a test today.”

“Jesus Christ, Dave.” Karkat groans, smiling at Dave’s absurd behavior.

  
  
  


Karkat ponders the offer for about a week.

Then another.

By the third week he’s able to really tell when Dave decides to smoke, saying even more asinine things than usual and having a slightly flushed face more often. Hell, he’s even stimming more openly on the days he gets high. 

Today he didn’t smoke, they’re eating lunch together and it’s been four weeks since Dave made the offer.

“Fuck it,” Karkat blurts out with a hushed voice.

“What?”

“I’m taking you up on your fucking hippy offer,” Karkat closes the book he was trying to read and faces Dave.

“Ohh, right, that. Do you mean today?”

“Sure, why not. It’s been eating at me for weeks and I wanna try it,” Karkat looks away, keeping his body faced at Dave, “if that’s like cool with you and Jade…” 

\---

“I gotta ask first, I’ll text her right now.”

  
  


**TG: yo jade**

**GG: what’s up cool kid?**

**TG: yknow how i made that offer to karkat like a whole month ago**

**GG: yeah, i do!**

**GG: did he take you up on the offer and thats why youre texting me?**

**TG: yeah pretty much**

**TG: you up for it or**

**GG: ill get something ready for you guys when i get home but i wont be joining you, ill be having a session by myself**

**GG: you remember where the pepper corn is right?**

**TG: yea**

**GG: cool! :D**

**GG: ill see you guys when you get home <3**

  
  


“She says it’s cool,” he says, putting his phone away, “I’ll walk you through the whole thing when we get back to my place, but if you ever wanna like back out, even at the last second, is completely fine by me. We can just hangout, shit I won’t smoke if you don’t want to so we can be on the same level.” he explains, patting Karkat on the shoulder.

“Thanks,” Karkat mumbles, looking nervous.

“Hey,” he puts his hands on Karkats shoulders, “it’ll be okay, champ”

“Oh fuck off,” Karkat laughs and gives Dave a small shove

“Yeah, it’ll be cool dude, and like, really, don’t feel pressured. Peer pressure don’t fly in the “hippy” community,” he reassures Karkat, gathering his crutches as the lunch period ends.

  
  
  


\--- 

  
  
  


“Okay, so these are peppercorn,” Dave explains as he and Karkat stand in his room, holding a bottle of pepper corn, “if you chew on these it will take you down from your high, but jus’ cause they do that doesn’t mean you should drive. You gotta wait until you’re fully sober.”

“So if I get like, fucking, paranoid or sick or something I should… eat  _ those? _ Are you sure?” he questions, eyeing the small bottle with doubt.

“Yes, Jade can explain the science behind it later. I can’t be fucked to remember why it works, but if Jade is telling me about science shit then I literally can’t not believe her,” Dave puts the peppercorn down on his nightstand and picks up a packed bowl and a lighter, “anyways, I’ll take the first hit cuz doin’ that gives you like, the upper hand in getting high or someshit. That’s a bad way to word it… uh, basically smoking first from a freshly packed bowl will get you higher. More science shit, ask Jade later if you wanna know.”

Dave opens a window before plopping down on his bed, holding the mouthpiece of the bowl to his lips before putting it back down again.

“And Karkat?” Dave asks, looking at Karkat with a smile.

“Yeah?” Karkat looks back, fidgeting.

“Do you wanna back out before I light this thing up?”

Karkat thinks if he has any work to do tonight or any tests in the morning. He does have a test, but he’s been studying like crazy all week and it’s later in the day tomorrow so… he decides that it’ll be okay and shakes his head.

“No, let’s do this.”

“Tight.” is all Dave says before taking a deep breath in and out, bringing the bowl back up to his mouth and flicking the lighter. Karkat looks on nervously.

Dave brings the piece away from his mouth and exhales, a plume of smoke oozing from his mouth and coughs a bit.

“Are you okay?” he asks, worry in his voice.

“Oh, yeah, I’m fine,” Dave replies, stifling his coughs, “jus’ got weak lungs is all.”

Karkats face gets more worried looking.

“Shit, sorry. I don’t mean it in like a cancer-patient-smoker-lung type of way, more like my lungs are never used to weed being in them cuz I don’t smoke often enough for them to adjust.” Dave shrugs, placing the bowl next to Karkat.

He hesitantly picks it up, waiting for Dave to hand him the lighter.

“Okay I know I’ve been talking a lot, maybe more than usual, but I gotta tell you something before I light you up.”

“What?”

“Breathe, man. It’s chill that you’re nervous, I was too when Jade first smoked me up,” Dave gives him a look that makes his stomach squirm. “Breathe in and out before diving in, put your thumb over that little hole, breathe in slowly when I light it up and cough after if you need to.”

Karkat hums in acknowledgment, breathes and puts the piece to his mouth. Dave leans over and flicks the lighter, tipping it downwards so the herb burns. Karkat inhales slowly for a few seconds, pats Dave to let him know to let up on the lighter, and inhales for a few seconds more before removing the bowl from his mouth.

He exhales, the smoke flowing from his mouth with trembling lips.

And then coughs. A lot.

Dave pats him on the back to help with his coughing, takes the bowl away from his hands and reaches over to set both it and the lighter on the nightstand.

“Do you have water?”

“Yeah,” cough “it’s in my bag, middle pouch.”

Dave walks over to his bag and takes out his water bottle, handing it to him.

“Drink some, it’ll help your throat from all the coughing and smoke,” Dave explains and sits besides him, flopping down onto the bed.

He drinks from his water bottle and wipes his mouth after placing it on the floor.

“How you feeling?”

“Uhm, nothing yet… I don’t think,” he replies sheepishly, rubbing his hands on his jeans.

“That’s cool, sometimes it takes awhile or nothing happens at all. If you still don’t feel anything after like… 30 minutes then let me know and you can try again.”

“Alright.”

  
  


\---

  
  


Dave stares at the ceiling for a while before looking over at Karkat.

“Yo…. wanna watch something? Preferably a comedy or someshit.”

“Sure, wanna watch…” Karkat pauses, “one of those superhero movies? Marvel, right? Don’t those have humor in them?”

“Fuuuuuck  _ yes _ dude,” he stands up and grabs the TV remote from the shelf under the TV and turns it on, clicking on the Disneyplus option, “did you have a movie in mind?”

“Well I’ve never really watched any of them, oh except for that Spider-verse one. That one was good, but I wanna watch a different one.”

Dave sits back on the bed, shifting over to the pillows and sits with crossed legs.

“How does “Doctor Strange” sound to you?” he asks, the box lighting around the film.

“What’s it about?” Karkat asks, looking at the cover image.

“Basically about this asshole surgeon who thinks he’s right all the time, and he usually is, but then he gets in a car accident, it’s his fault, and has to go to his strange witch lady to help him,” he explains and then continues after Karkat gives him a strange look, “I don’t wanna spoil anything dude, watching movies is a better experience when you know the bare minimum of information.”

“Okay, let’s fucking watch it then,” Karkat says, shifting to lay down beside him, “also, I think I’m feeling it now.”

“Niiiiice, and you can ask questions if you get confused. I’ve seen this a million fucking times so I know what happens.” he grins and presses play. He lays down and relaxes besides Karkat, letting his high immerse him into the film.

  
  
  


“What’s so fucking serious about him free-handing the procedure?”

“Damn, Karkat, maybe cuz there's a whole ass bullet in the dudes skull?” he laughs and puts his arm around Karkats shoulder, it’s a bit weird since he’s much smaller than him but it’s cool.

“Yeah, whatever,” Karkat huffs and leans into him.

  
  
  


“That’s his love interest, by the way,” he explains as the Doctor and a woman banter on screen, “but she barely gets screen time until some shit goes down.”

“What happened to no spoilers?” Karkat questions, poking Dave in his side.

“Dude, that was not a spoiler, just a vague statement,” he retaliates by poking Karkat in the side of the head with the arm that's around Karkats shoulder.

  
  
  
  


He and Karkat continue to watch the movie, bantering with each other every time Karkat asks a question. He slips off his shades, folds them, and hands them to Karkat.

“Hey, can you put these on the stand right there?” he asks, gesturing the nightstand. Karkat takes the shades and sets them down on the nightstand. He can feel Karkat crane his head up at him.

_ Is… he trying to see my eyes again? _

He gazes his eyes down at Karkat who then averts his own. Without his shades he can clearly see the blush that coats Karkats face, he looks back up at the screen and smiles to himself.

_ Haha, of course he was… Wait, what? Ah shit…  _

“How you likin’ the movie so far?” he whispers to Karkat.

“Uh, i-it’s good… kinda confusing, but that’s probably because I watch a whole different genre,” Karkat whispers back, shifting under Dave's arm.

“Do you wanna watch it later, we could just like… listen to some music and chill,” he suggests, feeling that watching such a convoluted movie could possibly be overwhelming for someone experiencing their first high. Damn it, why doesn’t he think this shit through?

“Are you sure?” Karkat asks quietly, Dave nods and pauses the show.

“Yeah, let’s just chill out for a while. Do you need the peppercorn at all?” he removes his arm from Karkats shoulders and stretches, a few audible pops come from his back, “oof, damn.”

“If you’re hungry we can get some snacks, it’ll kill your high but then again we can always ask Jade to pack another bowl if you want,” he, awkwardly, scoots over to the end of the bed and gets up to crack his back, “ugh, ever since my fuckn’ ribs healed I gotta be more careful about binding… can you wait here while I put on some of the tape stuff?”

“Yeah, take your time.”

“Thanks, I’ll be right back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill be adding the second part right after i finish it, school is already kicking my ass so i think im not gonna be updating as often. if i do update itll either be super long like this and the next chapter or itll be a small filler chapter.


	8. Stoner Kids, Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw/tw for talk of drug abuse and drug addiction, and for the present use of drug... cuz, yknow, theyre still smoking lol. also musik chapter again. so when you see **** i recommend playing "Yonkers", "A BOY IS A GUN", or "SMUCKERS" by Tyler, The Creator. or if youre not into him then just play whatever music you listen to with your friends, idfk.

Karkat pulls out his phone while he sits on Dave’s bed and looks through the notifications.

  
  


**TT: How is your afternoon going?**

  
  


**GG: heyyyyyyy, whatre you guys up too? :)**

  
  


**EB: do you have the answers to the homework?**

  
  


The message from John stands out to Karkat so he messages him back.

  
  


**CG: JOHN.**

**EB: hey, did you get my message?**

**CG: YES.**

**EB: cool**

**EB: uhm, can i have the answers?**

**CG: JOHN.**

**EB: whaaaat**

**CG: WE ARE NOT IN THE SAME FUCKING CLASS.**

**CG: YOU DO KNOW THAT, RIGHT?**

**EB: uuuhm**

**EB: i’ll talk to you later**

**CG: OKAY.**

  
  


_ Well, that was weird…  _ he thinks, putting his phone on the nightstand.

Karkat flops back down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as he waits for Dave to come back.

_ What’s taking so long? I swear to god if he got stuck again-  _ he can’t finish his thought without thinking about the first time he helped Dave out of his binder. He didn’t see  _ anything _ , but he saw a lot. Layers of scars on Dave’s back, freckles smothering his skin, his small muscles flexing as he lifted his arms… 

_ Is it okay to think about him like this? _

“Yo.”

“Huh?” he snaps out of his thoughts and turns his head to look over at the door. Dave is shirtless, two wide pieces of pale ivory colored tape meeting near his sternum and wraps around his ribs to tuck away his chest.

“I hope this is okay,” Dave gestures at his chest, “the tape tends to fold and get stuck to my shirt, so this is more comfortable.”

“That’s okay,” he gets off the bed and grabs his water, taking a sip, “you said something about snacks earlier?”

“Oh hell yes, come on,” Dave waves his hand at Karkat and turns around, “Grandpa Harley gets shit from other countries imported every few months, there’s not a lot of the foreign stuff left so we also got some good old ‘merican snacks to eat.”

“Okay, is Jade’s Grandpa rich or something?” he asks, following Dave down the hallway.

“Not really,” Dave walks slowly down the stairs, leaning against the railing, “he just has a lot of friends in many places around the world and they do favors for him because he helps them out from time to time.”

“Huh, okay,” he shrugs and follows Dave into the kitchen.

“Alright let's see what we got h-” Dave cuts himself off, lets out an over dramatic sigh and hollers “Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaade!”

“What?” Jade yells back from her room.

“Did you eat the last of the imported goodies?”

“Oops, yeah!” she calls back.

“Fuuuuuuuuhhhhh” Dave yells and shuts the cabinet.

“Sooooooooorryyyyy!” Jade laughs from the second floor.

Dave turns back to Karkat and waves him to follow him to the pantry.

“Alright, exotic snacks are a no go.”

“I heard,” he quips, smiling as Dave playfully punches him in the shoulder and says to shut up. Dave opens the pantry door and steps inside the small room.

“Okayyy,  _ so _ we got some uh fucken’ cosmic brownies, veggie straws, there’s also fruit in the freezer if you want that, and some cereal too,” Dave turns back around and leans against the door frame, “take your pick.”

  
  
  


****

Karkat and Dave are sitting on the floor of Dave’s room, eating their snacks and listening to music. He chose to eat some cereal without milk, Captain Crunch to be specific, and Dave is eating a bowl of frozen, cut up pineapple and strawberries.

“Okay, no, dude, listen,” Dave covers his mouth as he talks with his mouth full of fruit, “this is the fucking EPITOME of comedy.”

“You’re just going to show me that fucking picture of luigi in paris again” he snorts and covers his eyes.

“Dude, no I fucking promise is not luigi in paris,” Dave stifles his giggles, “just fucking look c’mon.”

He uncovers his eyes and looks at Dave, who then turns his phone around to show him the image.

“I fucking KNEW it!” he groans, smiling as Dave bursts into laughter.

“Pfft, hahaha oh my god, it's just so goddamn funny to me,” Dave wipes a tear away from his eye, “everytime I see it I think about that one Kanye West song.”

“The one about people in paris? Seriously?” he gives Dave an incredulous look and rolls his eyes, “of course you do.”

“Maaan, whatever,” Dave puts his phone down and takes a swig of water, “I’ll be right back, I’m gonna ask Jade to re-pack the bowl.” Dave sets down his bowl and stands up, “you up for that?”

Karkat pops a red piece of cereal into his mouth and nods, “yeah, I’m still not really feeling anything either anyways.”

  
  


\---

  
  


“Aight, I’ll be back,” he says before exiting his room and walking down the hall to Jade's room. He knocks twice on her door.

“Who is iiiit?” Jade calls in a sing-song voice.

“It’s Dave.”

“Oh, come in!” she says gleefully, he opens the door.

Jade takes notice of how he doesn’t have his shades or his shirt on.

“Did Karkat leave?” Jade asks with a small frown on her face.

“Nah, why?” he leans against the door frame.

“Uhm, no reason!” she replies quickly, “did you need something?”

“Yeah, would you mind packing us another bowl? Karkat still isn’t feeling anything and we just ate so…” he shifts uncomfortably, he still hates asking for things from people.

“I still have enough to last me to next week, want me to roll you a little something?” Jade scoots over to her dresser drawer and pulls out a small box. Dave takes notice on how she’s hiding her stuff again.

“Did Grandpa try to use your stuff again?”

“Siiiiigh, yes,” she looks down and opens the box, setting down a bottle of the medical drug and a few tools to roll a small joint, “he keeps wanting to make edibles again, but we’ve never even made edibles. He still doesn’t seem to understand that I got those edibles from Gamzee,” Jade audibly shudders, “never again.”

“Ohh shit, I remember that day,” he sits on Jade's bed, “I still can’t believe he put other shit into those cookies without telling you, like, what’s the point in lacing something that’s already fine?”

“Well,” Jade places four small buds into a grinder and hands it to Dave, “grind please, well… Gamzee isn’t a horrible dude, but he’s done so many hard AND soft drugs, sometimes all at the same time, that he’s pretty much destroyed the common sense part of his brain…” she sighs.

“That’s uhm… kind of sad…” he mumbles, twisting the top of the grinder, “has anyone tried to help him?” he hands it back to Jade after making sure it’s completely grinded. She takes it and starts packing a small cone.

“Some friends and his family tried to get him to go to rehab but… actually, I don’t even know what  _ exactly _ happened, just that it didn’t work and he never went to get help. Obviously I don’t talk to him or buy from him anymore…” she uses a small, wooden stick to tightly pack the herb into the joint, “He  _ is _ the reason I talked to Grandpa about getting a medical card in the first place though, maybe I should thank him sometime!” she laughs as she twists the end of the cone close and hands it to Dave.

“Thanks, Jade. If we don’t finish this I’ll come back and give it to you,” he gently holds the joint and stands up to walk out the door.

“Aww, thanks!” Jade coos, “shut the door on your way out, please!”

Dave nods as he walks out of her room and shuts the door, he walks back down the hall to his room.

  
  


\---

  
  


Karkat looks around Dave’s room while he’s gone. There’s not much on the walls, probably because all of his stuff was left at his brother’s apartment after he finally escaped that hell hole.  _ Maybe I should buy him some posters for Christmas? Wait, does he even celebrate that holiday? I know Jade and John celebrate Christmas and that Rose is jewish so she celebrates Hanukkah… I should probably ask what holiday he participates in, if any…  _ He pops a few more pieces of sugary cereal into his mouth and washes it down with some water.

_ Maybe he would like new turntables too? Or maybe I could get him some sort of drawing tablet so he doesn’t have to fuck around with a computer mouse to make comics…  _

He’s pulled away from his thoughts as Dave comes back into the room, holding a… cigarette?

“Hey,” Dave greets, shutting the door behind him, “look what I got.” Dave holds out the weird cone thing and then jokingly sniffs it like it’s a cigar as if he’s a 1950’s mob boss.

“What the fuck is that?” he asks and looks at the cone with suspicion, “is it a cigarette?”

“Dude, you really need to watch more non-romcom media or something,” Dave jests at him, cracking a smile, “it’s a joint, not a ciggie.”

“Oh, okay,” he eases and puts down his bowl of cereal.

“Yeah, so if you’re up for it I’ll light it up?”

“Sure, I doubt that I’ll feel anything though.” he says plainly, trying to hide his disappointment.

“Maybe, I dunno,” Dave grabs the lighter off the nightstand and takes a pillow off his bed to sit on the floor with. Dave flicks the lighter and burns off the twisted end of the joint, blowing off the charred remains. “Everyone is different, some don’t get the experience until after doing it a few times… but I think that’s mostly because they aren’t inhaling it right. Shit, I forgot the ashtray. Can you get it? It’s in the bottom drawer of the nightstand.”

Karkat nods and gets up, walking over to the nightstand. He pulls open the drawer and fishes out the ashtray, holding it out to Dave, “this?”

“Yeah, thanks.” Dave leans over and grabs it from him, setting it on the floor, “it’s okay if you accidentally get ash on my floor, I can always clean it up later.”

Karkat sits back down, watching Dave as he wraps his lips around the end of the joint and flicks the lighter. Dave brings the lighter to the cone and lets it burn for a few seconds before taking the lighter away, keeping his mouth on the joint as he inhales. Dave takes the joint out of his mouth and exhales a small stream of smoke through parted lips. No coughing this time.

Dave hands the joint to Karkat and clarifies that he doesn’t need to light it again until it goes out.

He imitates how Dave was holding the cone, brings the end of it into his mouth, and inhales. It goes down smoother this time so he doesn’t end up coughing as much when he exhales. He places the joint into the ashtray and-

It hits him. His head swims a bit as a feeling of euphoria and relaxation buzzes over him, he feels a vibration-like sensation run down and over his body.

“Ohhh…. shit,” he laughs breathily, leaning back a bit and placing a hand over his face.

“Yoooo… are you feeling it now?”

“Yes.”

“Yooooo!” Dave laughs loudly and picks up the joint from the ashtray, taking another hit.

  
  


\---

  
  


He knows what Karkat is experiencing right now, it doesn’t happen every time but it sure as hell happens the first time.

He takes another hit and sets the joint back into the ashtray.

“What winter holiday do you celebrate?”

“Huh?” he looks back at Karkat, “oh, shit, I mean we celebrate Christmas in this house but I was never like introduced to any other religious holiday. I’ve just celebrated shit like Halloween and Bro pretty much celebrated Saint Patties day all year long so…” he shrugs “I guess I celebrate Christmas?”

“Damn… alright,” Karkat looks away for a moment, “have you ever wanted to like, research your family tree and see what their religious upbringing was?”

He’s kind of taken aback by the question, not in an offended way but in a sense of realization. The realization of why the  _ hell _ hadn’t he thought about doing that before?

“Oh my flipping christ,” he gets up and retrieves his laptop, “Karkat you’re a fucking genius and I love you.”

Karkat doesn’t answer to that, Dave sits down next to him nonetheless and sets the laptop into his own lap and opens it.

He opens Google and moves the cursor to the search bar.

“Karkat,” he snaps his fingers, “we gotta focus here. How do I find this shit out?”

“Okay, okay, search up “family tree” or something. There’s so many sites but…”

“But what?”

“You always have to pay to get the full results,” Karkat says dejectedly.

“I’ll be right back.”

“Okay…?”

Dave plops the laptop into Karkats lap, scrambles to his feet, and runs out of the room (to the best of his ability, because he’s still in a fucking leg brace). He hurries downstairs to Grandpa’s study and peaks inside.

“Grandpa Harley…?”

“Dave, my boy!” Grandpa bellows from behind him, a small “ah fuck shit” escaping from him, “how many times have I told you to just call me grandpa?” he gives out a hearty chortle and ruffles his hair, “just pulling your chain, son. You didn’t let your friend drive home after… oh what’s it called…”

“Smoking up?”

“Yes, that! The fellow is still here, right?”

“Yeah, why is everyone asking me if Karkat left yet? Nevermind, anyways, I need to ask for a favor from you Grandpa Harley.”

“Well, what is it lad?”

  
  


Dave takes a deep breath in.

  
  


“Okay so basically Karkat asked me what winter holiday I celebrate and so I told him that I celebrate Christmas with you guys but never had a religious upbringing so I have no idea what the rest of my family celebrates and-” gasp “and Karkat was all like “have you ever thought about looking up the rest of your family?” and I was like “Karkat you magnificent sonuvabitch” and so we were gonna look it up but apparently it costs money to get the full results so-”

“Dave, Dave, slow  _ down _ ! Give it to me straight, boy.”

“Can I borrow your credit card…?” he asks quietly, averting his eyes.

Grandpa Harley seems to think over the request, stroking and twisting the end of his mustache. After what feels like some time, Grandpa Harley nods his head with a cheery look on his face and marches into his study. Not a moment later Grandpa emerges from the room and hands Dave a credit card.

“Now, remember to give that back when you’re done. This old fellows memory isn’t what it used to be, so don’t go splashing out!” Grandpa turns him around and gives him a gentle push forward, “go on, leg it!”

Dave hurries up the stairs and down the hallway to his room and shuts the door behind him when he enters. He sits next to Karkat again and pulls the laptop back into his lap.

“Where did you get a credit card?” Karkat asks as he types and clicks on the first website that pops up from the search.

“I got it from Grandpa,” he makes an account for the website, putting the credit card info in there as well.

“Oh wow, how long have you had it for?”

“About three minutes,” he glances at Karkat and begins to put in more information so the site can pull up records and whatnot.

“Dave, did you pocket that from your Grandpa?”

“Man, what? No, of course not. I’m so offended, this is offensive,” he jokes, “nah, I didn’t steal this. I asked if I could borrow it, I’m not some heathen who steals from his silly, adoptive, british grandpa. Hold on,” he reaches under his bed and slides out a small shoe box, opens it and plucks out a folded piece of paper, “need this thing.” He unfolds the paper, which is his birth certificate, and reads back and forth between the paper and the screen.

Karkat doesn’t say much as Dave types away on his keyboard, soon the website is processing the information given to it and they wait for it to load the results.

Dave sets the laptop aside on the floor and picks up the joint from the ashtray and lights it again, taking a few short puffs from it. He hands it over to Karkat, who takes a small hit and sets it back into the ashtray.

The website loads and displays the results, he places the laptop back onto his lap and looks through it. He clicks on a section titled “RACE/ETHNICITY/HERITAGE” and reads it.

“Yo, what the fuck does “hebrew” mean?” he points at the screen and Karkat leans over to look.

“Dude, it means your family is jewish.”

“Man, really? Like Rose?” he looks at Karkat, looks back at the screen and smiles, “that is  _ so  _ sweet, I can’t wait to tell her man!”

“Maybe she’ll even invite you over to Hanukkah!” Karkat adds, “she’ll probably be happy to know that she’s not the only jewish kid at school anymore.”

“She complains about that?”

“Kanaya talks about her a lot, so, yeah apparently she does.”

Dave scrolls down to a section titled “FAMILY TREE” and clicks on it, just out of curiosity.

“Oh my god…” he whispers, his hands hovering over the mouse pad.

“What?” Karkat leans in again to look at the screen, “surprised to see that you have other family members?”

“No, I-I mean…” his chest feels tight and his throat dry, he points a trembling finger at a small icon on the family tree, “I have a brother…”

“Yes, Dave, we all know that far too well-”

“No, Karkat,” he cuts him off, “I have  _ another _ brother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay there MIGHT be a part three to da stoner kidz idk i like writing about getting high lmao. also making dialog for Grandpa Harley is so hard, idfk how British people talk and he IS technically Jake English so i just... made him say silly british things like jake would. no, seriously. i literally looked up and went on several websites containing british phrases, sayings, and slangs. jesus. also hope you guys enjoyed the silly meme i put in, its honestly my favorite image ever.


	9. Love Songs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayy alright yall, music chapter, you know the drill. we got several songs on the agenda today, first is "Hooked On A Feeling" by Blue Swede, next we got "Don't You (Forget About Me)" by Simple Minds, then "The Promise" by When In Rome, and finally "Cars" by Gary Numan. now you dont GOTTA play these songs, but theyre good for setting da mood and i personally love them.

It’s been a week since that whole fiasco happened. Karkat feels bad, and for once it’s not because he thinks he did something wrong. He feels bad for Dave, he never even knew he had a second brother until now. For 18 whole years he never knew, never even talked to the guy. It gives Karkat yet another reason to hate Bro, the fucking asshole.

He tries to take his mind off of that by thinking about what to get Dave for Chri- er, for  _ Hanukkah _ . He kind of still can’t believe Dave is jewish, who would’ve guessed?

_ Hm… maybe I  _ **_should_ ** _ get him a drawing tablet…  _

“Karkat?” a soothing voice brings him out of his head and to the present. He’s sitting in class with Kanaya and is supposed to be working on a project with her.

“Yeah, sorry. Where were we?” he forces himself to focus on the work assigned to him.

“We weren’t really anywhere, actually…” she sighs, “what is plaguing you, Karkat?”

“It’s fine, Kanaya, really,” he opens his notebook, flipping past Dave’s doodles, to organize their project.

“But-”

“Kanaya,” he cuts her off, “I’ll talk to you about it later, okay? It’s just that we are in.. you know… a public setting?”

“Right, apologies.”

“It’s okay, you’re just concerned” he mumbles.

  
  
  


\---

  
  
  


“Pssst, Dave, hey, hey Dave.”

Dave stops in the middle of the empty hall and looks around for who is calling him.

“Dave, over here!” he spots John waving to him from behind a wall and walks over.

[what’s up?]

“Oh, doing the hand language for today? That’s cool, uh…” John is quieter once Dave is within talking distance and begins fumbling with his hands, trying to piece together a coherent sign for Dave.

Dave puts his hands over Johns and pushes them down, signalling that Johncan just talk while he signs and leans against the wall to take pressure off of his brace.

“Okay, thanks. I’ve never been really good at the signing thing” John intentionally fumbles his hands when mentioning ASL.

[it’s cool, just takes practice] he signs with a shrug, [ _ so _ what’s up?]

“Oh, right. Uh, sooo… how have you been?” John asks with an awkward smile.

He gives him a deadpan expression along with signing a [ _ really? _ ]

“Dave, you’ve been cagey n’ stuff all week!” John exclaims, keeping his voice down, “did something happen?”

[man, i’m fine, relax.] he rolls his eyes from behind his shades, though John can’t see it.

“Dude, I know when my best bro is feeling down,” John crosses his arms over his chest, giving Dave a very insincerely sassy look, “talk to me?”

[okay, you’re right, text you after school.] he shifts his weight onto both feet and makes his way to the bathroom, waving goodbye to John.

  
  
  


\---

  
  
  


Karkat messages Kanaya later that day, asking her if she has time to talk.

  
  


**GA: Yes**

**GA: I Do Have Time To Talk**

**CG: OKAY GOOD**

**CG: I HAVE THINGS TO SHARE WITH YOU, BUT IT’S GOING TO EXTREMELY VAGUE SINCE IT ISN’T MY INFORMATION TO JUST GIVE OUT**

**GA: That Is Fine**

**GA: I Am Simply Happy To Only Listen To What You Give Me**

**CG: UM, OKAY**

**CG: SO BASICALLY I WENT OVER TO DAVE’S HOUSE DURING THE WEEKEND**

**CG: IT WAS FINE FOR THE MOST PART UNTIL I BROUGHT UP THE HOLIDAYS AND THEN WE GOT INTO A CONVERSATION ABOUT RELIGIOUS UPBRINGINGS AND SO ON AND SO FORTH**

**CG: BASICALLY WE ENDED UP GOING ONLINE AND HE FOUND SOMETHING THAT IS EMOTIONALLY EFFECTING HIM AND I DON’T KNOW HOW TO HELP**

**GA: That Is Quite A Situation**

**CG: YOU CAN FUCKING SAY THAT AGAIN**

**GA: Yes**

**GA: Well The Most Advice I Can Give You Is To Just Simply Ask Him If He Wishes To Talk About It**

**CG: YEAH I KNOW**

**CG: BUT I DON’T WANT TO UPSET HIM BY ASKING IF HE WANTS TO TALK ABOUT IT**

**CG: IF HE WANTED TO TALK ABOUT IT WOULDN’T HE COME TO ME, OR SOMEONE ELSE, AND ASK IF HE COULD TALK TO THEM ABOUT IT?**

**GA: Some People Just Need A Push In The Right Direction Is All**

**CG: RIGHT**

**CG: THANKS KANAYA**

**GA: Of Course**

**GA: And Karkat**

**GA: You Should Get Him That Drawing Tablet For Hanukkah**

**CG: YOU KNOW, I *WOULD* ASK HOW YOU KNOW AT LEAST HALF OF THAT STATEMENT BUT I’M PRETTY FUCKING SURE I ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER**

  
  


Karkat puts his phone away after that, he doesn’t have time for asking how the actual  _ fuck _ she knows that he was thinking about getting Dave a tablet for Hanukkah. He wasted enough time fucking around on his phone and needs to hurry up to Dave’s classroom so he can drive him home.

  
  


\---

  
  


Dave waits for Karkat in front of his classroom. John messages him, asking if he wants to come over to talk but Dave just wants to chill at home so he declines. He thinks John will understand.

Karkat comes jogging up to him, he greets him with a subtle nod.

“Is today a no talking day again?” Karkat asks him as they walk through the halls.

He nods again, shifting the shoulder straps of his backpack.

“Alright, anyways…” Karkat tilts his head down to look at Dave, “do you know what you want for Hanukkah?”

_ “Hanukkah?” _ the word almost makes him freeze in his tracks. His head shoots up to look back at Karkat, he knows that his inner panic is written all over his face.

He can see a few students look over at them from Karkats question, the school isn’t antisemetic per se but… this  _ is _ Texas so it’s expected that more than enough of the students aren’t fond of jews. It puts him on edge.

He quickly glances behind them. Karkat seems to get the message and drops the conversation, guiding him to stay closer as they walk towards the exit.

They leave the school building without problem, Dave hopes that the students who overheard Karkat think that they must’ve heard wrong. Rose used to get a bunch of shit from some people for being jewish until Jade and John got suspended for putting a stop to it. He can fight his own fights though because no one in this school fights like Bro, or at least he hopes none of them do.

He gets into Karkats car and sighs in relief as they pull out of the parking lot.

“I’m really sorry about that Dave, I completely forgot how this school can be sometimes.” 

He knows that he  _ has _ to speak when talking to Karkat while he’s driving. CAn’t exactly watch someone sign and watch the road at the same time.

“It’s cool,” his voice cracks, he looks out the window, “I don’t even know what I want anyways…”

“Alright, I guess I’ll just have to surprise you then.” this gets his attention, so he looks back at Karkat.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you don’t know what you want so whatever I get you will be a surprise,” Karkat glances over at him and smiles, “you know?”

It surprises him how easily Karkat can get him back into a good mood, let alone a good enough mood to keep speaking.

“I’m onto you, Vantas.” he squints at Karkat, even though he can’t see it, and plugs his phone into the aux, “any requests?”

“Hm… how about that one 80’s song?”

“Which one?”

“The one by the swedish dudes,” Karkat suggests, turning down a street.

“Nice, a classic.” he chuckles and puts on “Hooked On A Feeling” by Blue Swede.

  
  


*---*

  
  


Dave puts on the song that Karkat requested, it’s a silly song but damn if it also isn’t a cheesy love song. He sings with the music, voice deep, tapping his hands against the steering wheel.

He steals a look at Dave, who’s nodding his head to the music, and smiles.

The song fades out as it ends, Dave clears his throat and Karkat glances at him again.

“You’re really good at singing,” Dave says quietly, scrolling on his phone - probably looking for another song to play.

“Oh, thanks, hah,” he replies sheepishly, keeping his eyes on the road and stopping at a red light, “I’d sure hope I’m good, or else my dad wasted fucking hundreds of dollars on lessons.”

“Do you know any other songs like that?”

“Maybe? My dad plays the same ten songs on fucking repeat, and he mostly listens to 50’s and 60’s top hits… My mom would play all 70’s and 80’s but would  _ also _ play the same song over and over again.” He smiles at the memory of his mother singing in a long, flowy, yellow dress. That day she had only worn a necklace with a small locket on the chain and a pair of blue gem studs, none of her usual rings or bracelets.

“Should I que up a 70's and 80’s playlist?”

“Yeah,” he steals a glance at Dave and smiles fondly, “why not.”

He hears the sudden vocals as the song starts up and chuckles out a small “oh my god.”

He mumbles some of the lyrics in the first few lines and Dave jokes that he doesn’t even know the song, to which he sticks his tongue out.

“Don’t  _ youuu _ … forget about  _ meeee _ !” he sings and dances with his shoulders, just sort of shimmying them, and points his finger at Dave as he sings.

Dave smiles and gives out a small laugh at his goofiness.

He continues to sing along to the song, dancing with his arms and torso to make the song more dramatic, but in a silly way since it’s such a cheesy song.

As the song fades out he settles down, breathing out a small laugh.

“Bravo, I hoped the passing drivers enjoyed the show just as much as I did,” Dave exclaims, Karkat can see him smiling out of the corner of his eye. He simply rolls his eyes, a small smile creeping onto his face.

  
  


*---*

  
  


The afternoon sun glows onto Karkats face as he waits for the next song to come on, and Dave can't help but stare. Karkat isn’t looking back at him, of course with the driving and all, but he can see how Karkats iris’s shine from the sunlight. His dark, chestnut eyes glimmer into lighter shades of brown and amber - hues of deep, wondrous honey.

_ Holy shiiit _

“Ah, my mom  _ loved _ this song!” Karkat exclaims, a smile spread across his face.

“Oh,” he looks at his phone, “The Promise?” He looks back up at Karkat and notices that they’re almost at his house.

Karkat nods with a small hum.

And then he begins singing with the song, but it’s less silly and more focused this time. At first Dave doesn’t pay attention to the lyrics, just keeping himself enamored in Karkat's voice, until he glances over at him. He takes a moment too long to look away, anxious that he was caught staring.

Karkat seems to start singing with more emotion, putting emphasis on certain lyrics.

“I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say. I know they don't sound the way I planned them to be,” Karkat takes a long glance at him after turning down his street, he looks back over at Karkat as he sings.

“I gotta tell ya’” they near his house, “need to tell ya’, gotta tell ya’” the car stops in front of his house.

“I’ve gotta tell  _ yaaaa _ ’”

Karkat stops singing and looks at him, the sun shining on only half of his face now. He can completely see how the sun luminates the darkness of his eyes, and how his tan skin looks golden against the setting rays. The song continues playing.

_ Fuuuck, what do I do? _ He asks himself in a slightly gay panic.  _ Should I kiss him? Is trying to kiss him to his  _ **_mom's_ ** _ , his mom of all people, favorite song an okay thing to do? _

He leans ever so slightly towards Karkat, praying that he’s not reading the situation wrong and that he isn’t offending Karkats poor mother.

Karkat leans in towards his face, his face turning red.

Another song has begun to play,  _ thank god _ , it’s more funky and techno than the others they just listened to but Dave sure as hell isn’t gonna let some song ruin this for him. It’s embarrassing to admit, but this  _ is _ his first kiss. Yeah, 18 years old and he’s just  _ now _ having his first kiss.

Karkats slowly raises his hand, trembling as he gently cups the side of Daves head. He inches his face closer to Karkats, watching his eyes flutter close. He follows suit, closing his eyes.

His lips brush against Karkats, a shaky sigh escaping from them. Karkat tenderly pushes against Dave’s head as he leans in to seal the gap between them.

He stays still for a moment as they connect, realizing he doesn’t fucking know how to kiss someone. Karkat keeps his hand on Dave's face but pulls away.

“I… i-is everything okay?”

He opens his eyes, his vision filled with a very concerned Karkat looking back at him.

“Y-yeah,” he leans into Karkats touch, “I just… like, dunno what the fuck I’m doing.”

“O-oh!” the worry seems to melt away from Karkats features, “that’s okay…”

“So…” he reaches up to take off his shades, “can I try again? Practice makes perfect, y’know.” it takes all of his will power not to wiggle his eyebrows.

“Shut up, yes.” Karkat mutters, taking his lips back into Daves. He closes his eyes as the newly familiar pressure returns.

This kiss is… still kind of fucking awkward, but it’s better nonetheless since he’s actually contributing to it. Karkats lips are soft against his own cut, chapped lips.

He hesitantly breaks off the kiss, knowing that Grandpa will start to get worried if he’s not in the house soon.

“Um, I-I gotta-”

“I know, it’s okay,” Karkat slides his hand off of Daves face and presses the button to unlock the car doors, “don’t forget your phone.”

He smiles and nods, slipping his shades back onto his face. He picks his bag off the floor of the car, the music cutting off as he unplugs his phone from the aux cord and pockets it. He pops the door open and steps out, swinging his bag over his shoulder.

“Hey,” he leans down between the car and it’s door, peering at Karkat, “I’ll text you after I’m done my work, yeah?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Sweet,” he waves goodbye and shuts the car door, stepping back to give Karkat room to drive off. He waits for Karkat to be out of sight.

“Yes!” he pumps his fist into the air, “hell yes!”

“Hell…” he runs up the driveway.

“Fucking…” he practically bounces as he makes his way up the steps to the front door and swings it open, “YES!!!” he yells as he bursts into the house.

“ _ Dave! _ ” Grandpa hollers, “for god's sake, we have a guest, by golly!”

“Whaaat? I didn’t even do anthi-” he looks over at Grandpa, his eyes widen as he sees the guest Grandpa was referring to.

“oh SHIT!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey yall my guardian got covid, so me and the rest of my house are getting tested today (12/10/20) and tomorrow... wish us luck!


	10. The Brony Returns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter, writing new one as we speak

He stared at the shaded man standing next to his grandpa, loosely holding a duffle bag. His hair was stuck up meticulously, several piercings on his face - bridge, eyebrow, snakebites, along with a few helixs on one ear while both ears were pierced with simple studs.

Dave thought that Bro was standing in front of him, what with the triangle shades and all, but Bro was super against piercings of any kind. And this guy was short, not short like Dave but much shorter than his older, or really _oldest_ , brother.

He was still frozen in place, trying to rationalize that this guy wasn’t his Bro but who else could this guy be-

Dave’s face softens in realization, because fucking duh - no one could look that much like his former guardian and _not_ be related to him.

“Dirk?” he asks in a hopeful, yet questioning tone.

“In the flesh,” the older male gave a little smirk. Dave drops his bag onto the floor with a soft thud and makes his way over to his brother.

“How did you find me?” he asks as they clasp hands and embrace each other in a bro-grab.

“When I heard the news about a kid surviving a three story drop from the rooftop of an apartment in Texas,” Dirk lets go of the embrace to look at Daves face, “I knew it had to be you.”

“Wait, that was on the news?” He looks at Grandpa and frowns.

“I might have misspoke,” Dirk interjected, “It was on an online article.”

“Oh.”

“If I may?” Grandpa speaks up, both boys nod, “Dave, why are you late?”

“Uhm,” he shifts his weight, bashful, “traffick?” He doesn’t know why he lied, Grandpa was perfectly fine with people being gay and shit like that. Grandpa raises an eyebrow but decides to drop the topic nonetheless with a simple “please don’t let it happen again.”

“Has he met Jade yet?”

“Who’s Jade?” Dirk asks back, setting his bag against the wall and placing his hands into the pockets of his pants.

“She’s practically my sister,” he waves for Dirk to follow him upstairs, “you’ll love her, come on.”

He and Dirk walk up the stairs and into the long hallway towards Jade's room.

“This is my room, we can check it out later though,” he gestures to his room, Dirk gives a sharp nod.

“Dave?” Jade calls out from her room, “did you make a new friend? I thought I heard you talking to someone downstairs.”

“Something like that,” he calls back and looks at his brother, “c’mon.” The two boys walk down to Jade’s room and knock on the door.

“Come in!”

Dave opens the door and walks in, Dirk following from behind. Jade is sitting at her desk, scribbling something in her notebook. She turns around in her swivel chair and beams at the boys.

“You gonna introduce me to your new friend, coolkid?” she asks, leaning forward expectantly.

“This is Dirk, he’s my brother,” he says simply with a smile.

Jade doesn’t seem to register what he said for a few moments, her eyes widen and next thing they know she’s out of her chair and giving Dirk a bear hug. He doesn’t reciprocate the hug since she has his arms pinned to the sides of his body, his triangular shades askew and poking into his face.

“Damn girl, let him breathe,” he tries to pry the buff girl off of his brother. She lets go with an embarrassed look and squeaks out an apology as Dirk leans over, hands on his knees and huffing.

“Holy shit,” Dirk stands up and straightens his shades, a red mark from where they were stabbing him forming on his cheek, “she’s much stronger than my gym buddy.”

“I can’t believe he’s right in front of me, and so soon! Didn’t you just find out about him last week?” Jade sits back in her chair, her legs crossed over each other.

“What do you mean?” Dirk raises an eyebrow, his arms folded over his chest, and looks over at Dave, “you didn’t know I existed until a _week_ ago?”

“Uhm, yeah, pretty much,” he looks at Jade and then back at Dirk, “should I’ve known sooner or?”

Dirk sighs, “no, well… yeah, no” he extends his arm in an exasperated manner, “I, for some reason, thought he’d tell you about me.”

“What, Bro?” he sits down on Jade’s bed, looking down at his scar filled hands.

“Yeah, him,” Dirk looks down at Dave, shoving his hands into his pockets, “I knew you when you were a baby, so I figured he’d keep the pictures up after I left.”

“Wait, how old are you? When did you leave?”

“Twenty-two, and I ran off when I was about eight or ten… it was so long ago.” Dirk looks away from Dave’s small figure and at Jade, he mouths “do you know about what happened with..?” and she quickly nods before he finishes. Dirk looks away, resting his chin into the palm of his hand. The three of them sit in silence.

“U-uhm… do you two want to have the rest of this conversation alone?” Jade asks in a hushed voice, Dave looks up at her and gets up with a nod. Dirk moves away to let him pass into the hallway, the older boy follows him out and shuts the door behind him.

Dave walks down to his room and holds the door open for Dirk, shutting it after they both enter.

“Why didn’t you come back for me, man?” he sits down on his bed, trying not to sound too upset.

“I wanted to.”

“But why _didn’t_ you?”

Dirk seems to brood over this question, a troubled expression hung on his face. Dave looks away, realizing he may not want to know the answer just yet.

“Nevermind, let’s just… talk about something else for now,” he reaches up behind his shades and pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to think of something to say.

“Your room is more or less vacant than I would’ve imagined,” Dirk speaks up, “I figure you’ve only been here for a few months, even so…” the older relative steps further into the room, observing the barren walls, “where are all of your belongings?”

“Dude,” he stifles a dry laugh and sits up to look at Dirk, “I’ve been here since like, fucking, freshman year? Yeah, ‘bout four years.”

“Seriously? That’s more surprising than it should be…” before he can ask why Dirk speaks up again, “also, why the hell does it smell like ganja in this whole house?”

“Ganja?” he raises a brow, trying to figure out what the fuck a “ganja” is.

“Cannabis, Dave,” Dirk lets out a heavy sigh, “weed, pot, reefer, grass, bud, h-”

“Yeah yeah yeah I get it, I get it,” he interrupts, waving his hand, “we smoke a lil, what’s the rub?”

“I have no problem with it, you two just seem a bit young to be smoking is all,” the older male replies nonchalantly, looking over the room once more. Dave doesn’t reply to his statement, because yeah they _are_ a bit young but one of them has a card so like… who gives a shit?

He wonders why Dirk is still looking around his vacant room and blank walls, a sense of insecurity jabs at him. He's been living here for four years, almost five, it’s all but embarrassing that he hasn’t made his room seem lived-in yet. Like at least get a poster or something, jeez.

His train of thought reminds him of an unanswered question, so he asks again.

“What did you mean by it’s more surprising than it should be?” he breaks the silence, meeting his brother's gaze.

“Oh, that,” his brother folds his arms over his chest, “I suppose… I just didn’t expect you to leave so young? And, by the article I mentioned earlier, I thought that you had finally made an escape by diving off of the roof mid strife.”

“Well, you’re not wrong… that’s pretty much exactly what I did, except I wasn’t even living at the apartment when the fucking strife happened…” he fidgets uncomfortably with the end of his shirt, smaller holes accompanying the new one he’s undoubtedly making right now.

Dirk seems to stiffen with a realization, tearing his eyes away from his younger sibling. He sucks in a small breath, pulling his mouth into a line after exhaling through his nose.

“Then why were you there?”

Dave looks away, eye downcast at his braced leg. He hasn’t talked about this to anyone. A painful twinge radiating from his back as he remembers the strife and how he got there in the first place.

“He…” his voice wavers, clutching the hem of his shirt, “he got me while I was leaving school…”

“We don’t have to talk about it,” Dirk offers, but Dave shakes his head in return. He _needs_ to talk about it, even if it’s just a small part of it.

“He renovated his truck to look like Mr. Harleys… I got in. I thought nothing of it even though Grandpa never drives up to get me, he always makes me walk in the parking lot so he can save up on gas,” Dave lets out a small laugh, though forced, “but then… t-then… I smelled it, his cologne and I knew I was fucked.”

He felt a hand rest gently on his shoulder and flinched, cringing at his reaction. Dirk keeps his hand there anyways, giving a firm yet comforting squeeze. A knowing silence is exchanged between the two, no words need be said to confirm how fucked up the situation was.

Dirk breaks the silence after moving his hand away from Dave’s shoulder and popping a squat besides him.

“So, tell me, why were you _actually_ late to come home?”

“Oh my god, I was only late by like - what, ten minutes?” he lets out a dramatic sigh, feigning innocence.

“It’s a boy.”

“What?”

“So, then it's a girl?”

“What? No!”

“Okay, so then it’s a boy.”

“Why does it have to be _someone_?” he groans with embarrassment, it’s too early for this shit - especially after such a wild conversation.

“It doesn’t _have_ to be, but I know it is,” Dirk smiles smugly after Dave socks him in the arm.

“Whatever, man,” he rolls his eyes, a faint smile crossing his face.

Another comfortable silence is shared for a moment, his hands clasped together whilst his brother has his hands at his sides, palms flat on the bed. As the silence goes on it gets awkward, but Dave doesn’t realize it as his mind runs a thousand miles a minute. He does take notice when Dirk gets and leaves the room, he seizes the opportunity to text Karkat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayo got an appointment tomorrow for the migraines, maybe i can get on some meds or something


	11. woops lol not an update

hey guys

school is sucking the life out of me

its hard trying not to fail my senior year

i literally just pulled a whole paper out of my ass like five minutes ago and it probably sucked ass and wont get a good grade

but now i have finals this week and then im being sent head first into a whole new slew of classes

so... i cant update this fic for awhile

a long while

i cant fail my senior year and have to re-do the whole thing

so i need to put my focus there and not on trying to get motivation to write for yall

so see ya later


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